Toitak
by Scottea
Summary: Sometimes when things that were lost or stolen are found there is a fresh awareness and appreciation of the importance of family and friendships. Thanks, Paramount, for letting me play with your toys.
1. Chapter 1

It had been yet another outpost that they were taking some basic supplies to on this mission for the Federation. Just the supply run that any ship, and any crew, could do but for some reason they had been sent and it annoyed Kirk. No, it did more than that, it infuriated him. He wondered if those in power had forgotten that his ship was meant for and designed and crewed for the exploration of space beyond the known boundaries as well as maintaining those boundaries and not home deliveries. He, and most of his crew, if not all members of it, were on the Enterprise to explore, to learn, and to see what is beyond the presently known.

Captain James T. Kirk was aware that the younger newer crew had been excited about being off-ship on a new place and shook his head as he realized that they still had a great deal to learn about repetition and how so many outposts were so much alike. It was good for them to get off the ship just for a change, to experience it for of the older crew knew what to expect and only stayed long enough off the ship to do the delivery, to have a quick look around, and to get back aboard as soon as possible.

As the captain it was his role to go and meet and greet the officials and to find out if what they were delivering to the outpost was the material that was required as well as to find out if any other form of support or aid was needed and to hear of any unusual conditions or situations that might be worth further investigation. Usually on so many of these trips they had had at least twenty-six various specialists that they were to leave and twenty-six they were to collect and take somewhere else but this was a plain delivery trip and it frustrated Jim Kirk.

Ever since Spock had received a personal message he had attended the meet and greet function and then gone into the different bars on each outpost and just looked around. Kirk had not asked why his Vulcan friend and First Officer had suddenly started doing it as he knew he would be told in time. Four times he had accompanied Spock to the bars and seen how the Vulcan part of his friend had just looked around the room. There had been those who had made it plain they did not like those who were different in their drinking establishments, especially those who were clearly not Human but there had been something in the quiet calm about Spock and how he often did not enter beyond the door or where he could see all in the bar that puzzled Kirk. It was as though he was looking for something, something he was unsure of.

At least this stop at Outpost Beta Thirty-six was the last and they would soon be doing what they were meant to be doing. This was one of the roughest outposts as it was largely a mining base and recycling station. Of all the outposts they visited Kirk knew that this would be the worst for Spock as most of the other outposts, while perhaps wary of those clearly alien to them, welcomed the Federation's assistance and personnel but on Outpost Beta Thirty-six there was a known, almost volatile, hatred of aliens, actually all outsiders for that matter. The Federation was only just tolerated as the ships meant trade and supplies.

Kirk had been in with the governor discussing what more the outpost needed that was not on the Enterprise when he was notified that Spock had been attacked and was back on the ship in Sickbay and in a healing trance.

The governor had looked at him, "You had been warned about allowing him off the ship, Captain. As I told you, there are some here who still do not like nor trust the likes of aliens for any number of reasons, bigotry is a very bad Human failing that is not kept hidden on this outpost in the middle of nowhere. We only have real problems when non-Humans are here. And, as I also told you, whoever did attack your officer did not kill him. There is a belief that it is best to let them live to tell how unwanted they are here than to kill them. A few aliens do succumb to their injuries. Your officer was attacked but will live. As far as this base is concerned the matter is closed."

It was clear to Kirk's annoyance that no action would be taken and he had quickly got back to the ship.

He had all but run to Sickbay as soon as he had materialized on the Enterprise and McCoy had stopped him at the door. "He's still in a healing trance, Jim. A few bumps and bruises but nothing serious. Would have been a lot worse but three officers rushed to his aid helped get him out. Only one of them was a security officer. I've sent them to their quarters for thirty-six hours rest and Collel will be off heavy duties for about a week till his hand and arm heals. They did say that one man, a very rich and powerful man apparently, had poured and handed out a lot of drinks and then had hurled insult after insult at Spock, inciting the others who gathered around Spock and starting to manhandle him. They had rushed in to protect Spock but he had been knocked unconscious by the time they could get to him."

"Only one a security officer? Which,"

"Collel. You really need to take time to at least know some of the regular crew, Jim. No need to get close and personal with them but know what they do. I'd bet there's officers who have been on this ship for some time that you know very little about. As for Spock, he could wake up any time soon if you want to wait with him."

For over an hour Kirk had sat beside the bed, waiting for Spock to come out of his trance. In his mind he was thinking of all he would have done to the man. All the charges he could have laid against him had the outpost and planet be bound more tightly to Federation laws. All he would have physically done to the man had he been there.

"Jim?"

"How are you feeling?"

"I am fully rested and will be able to resume duties shortly."

"Spock, I warned you about,"

"I had to go, Jim. It was the last place I could look."

"Look for what? Ever since you got that message from your father you have been acting odd. What was it? What are you looking for?"

For a few moments his friend lay with his eyes closed then looked at him, "Twenty-two standard weeks ago unknowns managed to illegally break into the special room where the only known collection of what you Humans would refer to as the musings of Surak was kept and stole one of the books. There were three volumes of the thoughts of Surak written in his own hand before he gathered them in the volumes which guide Vulcan and our way of life and the unknowns took the second one. Our best scientists have so far been unable to identify neither the signature of the ship nor the residue of who was in the room other than it being Human and male with indicators of alcohol consumption. It was obvious that they knew precisely what it was, where it was, and were aware that to Vulcans it is beyond price yet was minimally guarded as no Vulcan would think of entering the room without an Elder let alone dare to even touch the box the book was in."

"So that's why you've been going to the bars?"

"Through various informants it is known that an extremely xenophobic Human trader has it. It was reported that most of the traders observed seem to prefer drinks with a very high alcoholic content."

"But you do not even know what the person looks like, do you? You have to know that there are a lot of Human males who like to drink strong alcoholic drinks, just ask Mister Scott. Do you have any idea what the man might even look like? You do not think he would carry something like that around, do you?"

Spock gave him one of the rare smiles they shared before he sighed and laid back down, "I was attempting to employ something that Humans do. It is something, Jim, that seems to come so naturally to you that at times I find I almost envy you that ability and now, having tried and failed at it, I am even more impressed by your skills."

For a moment Kirk looked at his friend and saw the smile still about the dark eyes, "And what is that?"

"I, I was working basically from a hunch as I have seen you succeed with so many times. I was also aware, having watched you, Doctor McCoy and Mister Scott at functions and during drinking session, noted that many Humans, when inebriated, talk more freely and say things that reveal things they would not normally talk about."

Kirk half-smiled as he knew his Vulcan friend had seen them not overly inebriated but very much relaxed because of the drinks, "Did it help any?"

"That man had obviously more than merely heard of the theft as he said he heard that it was easy to take rare treasures like books out of the safest of safe places on Vulcan."

"Nothing else? He could have heard it anywhere."

"That is highly unlikely, Jim. Such things are not talked about to or with off-worlders." Dark eyes looked at him and Kirk saw the certainty. "He somehow knew of it. He also has a very deep disdain for Vulcans. He would know."

While Kirk sympathized with his friend he had also seen flaws in his thinking if he were truly acting on word-of-mouth. "Give me a moment and I'll go down and,"

" **No**!" it had been so emphatic that Kirk almost jolted. "He will know that you are my senior officer and most likely know you are not a bigot which would put you in danger. With the reaction given to those officers who came to my assistance it might be wise to recall all personnel."

Reluctantly Kirk had agreed. He had been to too many places where bigotry and racial hatred had caused the deaths of many. He walked over to the intercom, "Uhura, have all personnel return to the ship."

"Sir, all but one officer has reported back."

"Whoever is still on that outpost get them back immediately."

"Yes, Sir."

When Kirk looked back at his First Officer he saw that Spock was looking at him in an unusual way, one he had seen a few times when the Vulcan was trying to understand Human actions.

"Spock?"

"I can recall, just as I was being attacked and the three were coming to my aid, that another officer had walked by me, glanced at me, then went and sat with the man. Something was said and the man let him look in a sack. There was an odd movement, slight but there, in the way the officer stood, then he nodded and shook the man's hand as he sat down. I recall thinking it unusual as I could not recall ever seeing the officer imbibing in alcoholic beverages and yet he took and drank the glass of liquor that man handed him."

Anger flared in Kirk, "Who? Do you remember the name of the Officer?"

"I will deal with him, Captain. I remember Officer Collel was one of the three who came to my aid. What are their conditions?"

"They are fine although McCoy sad Collel has some minor injury to his hand and arm and is off-duty for a week or two. But are you saying that an officer from your own department ignored you?"

"Captain," Spock could see the anger building in his friend.

"Captain," Uhura's voice stopped him, "the last officer is ready to beam aboard and requests that Mister Spock be present."

"Tell whoever it is,"

"I will be there." Spock stood and looked at Kirk as his Captain and friend said, "Tell the Transporter Officer not to energize till I arrive."

"Now just you wait a a minute there, Spock. I'm the doctor here and I will say when you can leave."

Just for a moment as he stood Spock looked at the doctor, "Doctor McCoy, as you can see I am fully recovered and I have to get to the Transport Room."

"Not without me."


	2. Chapter 2

Kirk dismissed the officer behind the controls as they walked into the Transporter Room. He was fighting to control his anger that whoever this was as they had clearly had ignored Spock's plight and, instead, gone to drink with the man who was behind it all..

For a moment after the transporter had stopped they all just stood looking at one another then the officer stepped down from the platform and walked up to Spock holding out a box, "I believe this may belong to you, Sir." His breath was almost pure alcohol fumes.

Spock put a hand on the box and looked in it then at the officer who he realized was just barely standing before him. Only as he looked at the officer did he see the man was clearly unwell and caught the faint aroma of something he had not smelled in years as the officer breathed heavily. It was only as he actually took hold of the box with both hands that he saw the officer's brown eyes seem to glaze over just before he fell to the floor where he started to convulse and vomit.

In that briefest of moments, that seemed to occur in such events with Humans, those moment of inaction while they mentally process the event, Spock realized that the officer had held onto the box till he realized that he had a firm hold of it and had given a slight nod before collapsing. The officer had been making sure that he had a firm hold on the box and realized what it was before yielding to the demands of his body.

While McCoy crouched beside the officer, Kirk rushed to Spock's side as he had seen a look on his friend's face he could not recall ever seeing before, an almost open display of emotions in conflict, "Spock?"

"It, it is the book, Jim." There was a deep reverence to the way he had said it as he fought back not only the multitude of questions in his head but also the emotions trying to disturb his reasoning.

Two medical personnel rushed in with a gurney and they quickly had the officer on the way back to Sickbay and the cleaners took care of the mess the officer had left yet Spock had not moved, just stood looking at the box in his hands and the book in it.

"Are you alright, Spock?"

"I find myself unsure, Jim. For hundreds of years only the masters have held this. Once a year Vulcans may see it and the others but only in their protective room. To see them at any other times requires the permission of the Elders." When Spock looked at him Kirk saw uncertainty about the usually calm and assured eyes, "I, I find I am at a loss to know what to think, Jim. I am used to the conflict between my Human and Vulcan halves but I feel a conflict within my Vulcan self. A part is supremely honored to be holding this, to know I can return it to my people and another part of me wants to know the full details of how he got it as well as his present condition and if he was, in any way, permanently damaged in getting this."

"You sure that that is just is the Vulcan?"

A raised eyebrow did not surprise Kirk, "Captain, at this moment I am strictly Vulcan. I am aware of my Human side but at this moment I am Vulcan and yet I am torn. As you know Vulcans have strong emotions and, at present, I am only just managing them."

In silence Kirk followed Spock to the Vulcan's quarters and entered after him. It slightly astonished him to watch the way his friend almost reverently placed the box on his desk then placed his hand on it before closing his eyes. Kirk recognized this as one thing common in most religions and stood quietly waiting.

When Spock next looked at him it was as the First Officer he knew, all traces of the internal and, yes he acknowledged to himself, emotional conflict he had seen about his friend were gone, deeply buried and controlled once again. "Would it be at all possible for you to request permission to go to Vulcan? I will contact my father and let him know we have the book."

Kirk smiled, he knew that Spock knew full well that his father would contact T-Pau and she would ensure that the Enterprise went to Vulcan. "I'm sure that can be arranged as we are just awaiting our next orders so we may as well transport that back to Vulcan. When I explain to Command what it is I am sure there will be no problems."

"Thank you. While you arrange that I will first notify my father of the book and then go see Officer Hanley to not only ascertain his condition but also to find out exactly how he was able to obtain it. He was highly inebriated so that might have some bearing on the matter."

" **No, "** Kirk waited till Spock looked at him in as close to surprise as the Vulcan would allow himself to display **, " we** will go down **now** and find out how Officer Hanley is and then I will get permission to go to Vulcan and you contact your father. By now McCoy should have a better idea of what he has had to drink and be detoxifying him. I want to be there with you when McCoy says we can see him as he was clearly drunk while off this ship and his reason for that had better have to do with getting that."

McCoy stopped them from going into Sickbay and indicated his office and waited till they got in it before he turned and looked first at Kirk and then steadily at Spock before he looked at the patient in the other room, "Now I am not exactly sure what is going on in his body. Initially I thought that he was what used to be referred to as being in a drunken stupor but it appears Officer Colin Hanley has had some sort of very strong alcohol I have been so far unable to fully identify. As far as I can tell it has not caused any serious lasting damage but appears to have had an extremely strong anesthetic effect, his brain activity is what I would expect to fine in a patient undergoing major surgery. It also seems to have the same qualities as a very strong neuro paralyzer except instead of causing muscular tension this has caused all but the necessary muscles, like his heart and lungs, to totally relax and there are no reflex actions to even the strongest of stimuli I can use without risking breaking a bone. I can say, from what I know now, that both conditions do not appear to be permanent but it will take him a few days, or even weeks, before he will be fit for even minimal active duty if they last much longer. When I did further testing of the liquid he vomited, it seems to contain something that, in the old days on Earth, caused belladonna poisoning. But there was something much stronger than that for with that sort of poisoning the patient shows symptoms like dilated pupils, sensitivity to light, blurred vision, tachycardia, loss of balance, staggering, headache, rash, flushing, severely dry mouth and throat, slurred speech, urinary retention, constipation, confusion, hallucinations, delirium, and convulsions which I will not know about till he is conscious. We did see him profusely vomiting and he was also suffering severe diarrhea however he did not stagger, he showed no reaction to the lighting, and his speech was clear." McCoy closed his eyes and shook his head then looked back at Spock, "I'm sorry I cannot be more specific, Spock, but I really have no idea as to what has caused it nor how to treat it. From what I can tell it would have been something in his drinks, either the drink itself or something added to the drink that has had such an effect on him. Some extremely potent stuff, whatever it was, to still be able to keep him under this long. If you come back in a few hours he may be awake and only have a granddaddy of a hangover but I cannot say that for sure."

Spock kept looking right at McCoy and saw about the familiar face, those things the doctor would not say aloud but that they both knew. McCoy nodded his head in the direction of the Intensive Care Room and moved so Spock could see into the room. Although nothing was said Spock knew that McCoy had known of his need to at least see the condition Officer Hanley was in. Satisfied that, as he had suspected, McCoy not only had him fully monitored but also had two nurses in with him watching him and holding his hands, "Thank you, Doctor. I will be back in four standard hours before I go on shift. If you will excuse me, gentlemen, I wish to contact my father and tell him about the book and that we should be heading to Vulcan shortly to return the book to its rightful place."

Kirk had had no difficulty in getting permission from Starfleet Command to go to Vulcan and to spend no more than ten days there. Ten days would give the entire crew time to have a good break off the ship if they so desired. Momentary shame swept through Kirk as he realized how little he knew of the man, how little he really knew of most crew members apart from those he worked with most often. It was something that he had been told was best yet worst about the role of a Captain, the distance that had to be maintained between the captain and the crew for the mental health of both. He remembered that Christopher Pike had mentioned that there were a few of the regular crew that he should get to know and who were important to the well-being of the ship and invaluable when going to a new or unusual planet as they knew what to do. He had never bothered to follow up on that even though Pike had actually named Hanley as he had believed those six others he was close to and worked on a daily basis with were all he really not only needed to know but also had time for. He looked at his computer and heard what McCoy had said then said, "Computer, display all details related to Officer Colin Hanley aboard this ship."

Just for a moment Spock sat looking at the terminal on his desk. He recalled seeing the man pouring Officer Hanley a drink from a different bottle than the one he poured his own drink from. That aroma he had briefly been aware of on Officer Hanley's breath came back to him along with what McCoy had said. For just a moment he closed his eyes and nodded, it would be what one who disliked Vulcans would have. Calmly he completed the link to a private line on Vulcan. When his father answered Spock did not greet him in the usual Vulcan manner but held the box so that his father could see the book and saw the look on his father's face as he recognized the book. He was sure that the look on his father's face was close to what his own must have been.

"May, may I inquire as to how you not only found but also acquired this, my son?"

"I was given it by a fellow officer. I have yet to be informed as to just how he came by it but I shall notify you of that fact when we arrive. As we speak Captain Kirk is arranging for us to deliver it to Vulcan shortly."

"Have you known this other officer long? Is there any reason he would have known about it and its importance to Vulcan?"

"I have none of the information at the moment as to how he would have known about it and all I actually know firsthand about the officer is that he has been aboard the Enterprise since Captain Pike was in command but I have had little actual personal contact with him. I do recall Captain Pike saying he was a good officer and that I should get to know him and ensure he stays with the ship as he had more skills that most believe him to have. I am aware that part of his acquiring it required him to drink an amount of alcohol extremely hazardous to his well-being. I am possibly greatly mistaken but for a moment I believed he may have consumed some toitak but that has not been procurable even through illicit sources for many decades. I will give you full details when we arrive. I look forward to seeing you and Mother in nine standard days."

Spock knew he had, for only an instant, seen almost fear about his father's eyes when he mentioned toitak. He, too, would know that in Humans it severely suppressed the mental and physical abilities for at least twenty-one standard days to a state where only their heart and lungs were not affected if more than two point nine one millimeters were taken internally over a ten hour period of time and it caused brain death in Vulcanoids if more than zero point eight three milliliters were taken in the same time. Had any Vulcan sat with the man and imbibed which some would do to be sociable and in the hopes of verifying if he had the book, they would have died. Officer Hanley was suffering what humans were reported to endure, loss of muscular control apart from lungs and heart, along with a state of deep unconsciousness for an undeterminable length of time with an uncertain outcome. It had given him some relief and reassurance to know that of all doctors that could be with Officer Hanley that it was Doctor McCoy as he knew that if any doctor would fight to keep a patient alive it was McCoy. Even when faced with the facts that stubborn Human would not give up trying something, anything, to save a life. The fact that it would take all of his time and strength did not matter to that time was inconsequential to the fact he just might recover.

Spock felt a flicker of conflict as he was not sure if it were his Human or Vulcan side that was more concerned and for what reason. He was aware that his Human side was concerned strictly on an emotional level about wanting to be able to thank the man when he had recovered and that his Vulcan side was concerned as he want to know how the man had tracked the book, how he had known what to do. There was so much about Officer Hanley he did not know.

His father finally nodded, "I shall ask the Healers of the most beneficial treatment known for Humans suffering the effects of toitak and will send the information I receive to Doctor McCoy as, although I am certain that Doctor McCoy is an exceptional healer and best suited to tend to the officer, I do not believe he will have had experience in treating a patient suffering the effects of toitak. I will not tell them the exact reason for wanting the information. I will immediately inform the Elders of the book. I am sure they will want to assist in the treatment and care of the officer who risked so much to recover it and will be of assistance in ensuring he remains on the Enterprise as I believe we both are aware of what the Healers would want and do with toitak being used. Having experienced Doctor McCoy's form of medical practice I can attest that the officer would find no better care than on the ship under his care. Your mother and I will be pleased to have you visit."

When the transmission ended Spock sat before his computer for a moment calming the conflict within him and then nodded as he said, "Computer, display details of Officer Colin Hanley aboard this ship."


	3. Chapter 3

Kirk returned to Spock's quarters and found his First Officer just sitting at his desk staring at his computer screen and Kirk saw that he had also looked Officer Hanley's record.

"Spock?"

"I was uncertain, Jim, as to what I would find that might indicate how he would have known about the book. There was nothing unusual. He has been with the ship for seven years, has a very impressive array of citations both since being on the ship going back to his Academy days. I had no recollection that he was one of the top two in his field, Adaptive Civilian Transactions, in the whole of Starfleet. There are only thirty such officers active in Starfleet and Officer Hanley is the top one in active duty this far out as most are kept close to Command. If memory serves Captain Pike had rather lengthy discussions in order to get him aboard as Officer Hanley wished to be aboard and Captain Pike wanted him. As I told my father I do recall Captain Pike saying he was a good officer, that I should get to know him, and that I should ensure he stays with the ship as he had more skills that most believe him to have. I only now fully see the wisdom of his words. I would be interested to find out if his ACT training prepared him for this. I doubt if many know of his background."

Kirk nodded. The ACT group was a group of exceptional specialists; each officer more than physically fit enough to easily pass the required standard test while being highly specialized in totally blending into situations. On starships they were to be rostered around the ship so they were familiar with all the posts on the ship and the duties each posting involved. Officers from that field were the most adaptable, linguistically gifted, and multi-skilled officers: a small but very highly accomplished group that relied on diplomacy and cunning rather than diplomacy and brute force. As he thought over what Spock had said Kirk realized that his Vulcan friend was blaming himself for not knowing about Hanley's background.

"There are over four hundred officers in the crew, Spock, you cannot be expected to,"

"Jim, he has been rostered to the Science Division for the last four weeks, as he is one of the ten officers aboard the ship listed for constant rotation. As you know those officers have sixteen weeks in each different area. I should have studied his history when he was first rostered on. I was aware of the rotation and that he was listed but I tend not to study, in any great depth, the history of those who had not expressed an interest in a longer period in the Science Division, and he had not stated a preference for the Science Division. In the few conversations I have had with him in the Science Department he had, in fact, stated that he preferred to be on steady rotation to keep learning more about a variety of things rather than just specializing. While I greatly appreciate those who wish to keep learning throughout their career and life I do feel it necessary to have one special field of expertise. I found that unusual as he had very good skills in both applied physical science and anatomical science. It seems he prefers to have a very broad practical understanding of all departments on a starship rather than specializing."

"Spock," Kirk heard the blame and self-recrimination in his friend's voice, "you have been busy on the bridge."

"That is not a valid reason for me not to have looked further into his history, Jim, he was in my division. In the short period of time he had been in it I had received twenty-eight very favorable reports about his work and I even found most of his reports to be of exceptional detail and reflecting many possibilities for various outcomes, some of which I will find fascinating to explore further. I should have taken the time to at least talk more with him. He had presented many alternatives to some situations that I had not even considered. I allowed myself to believe that it would be a waste of my time to spend time with a person with a mind like that who clearly was not interested in applying it to science." Spock looked at his friend and almost smiled, "Did you know of his history, Jim?"

"I did not even know his name, Spock. When I heard it I was fairly sure he was a crewmember but I could not have told you where he was, what he even remotely looked like, and definitely none of his duties. I am the Captain and I,"

"Cannot be expected to remember all the names of all your crew and where they are stationed, Jim. That is what you have a First Officer and a Chief Science Officer for. I feel in this matter I have failed not only myself but, more importantly, you for,"

Kirk raised his hand, "We can both share the blame for this if you like. The main thing is to get that book to your people and to find a cure for whatever that toxin is." He briefly looked at the screen of Spock/s computer and noticed, just below it, the light flashing indicating an inter-ship message waiting, "You going to check that message?"

"It is most likely nothing but you are correct, Jim, I should check it. It will not take long and you should stay as there is nothing for me to hide from you." Spock opened the message and looked at Kirk when he saw it was from Officer Colin Hanley.

"What?"

Spock looked back at the message and read it aloud, "Sir, I am going back to Outpost Beta Thirty-six as I have heard, from a local, that there is a man who claims to have a very rare Vulcan treasure stolen from a sacred place and will gladly give it to anybody who can drink him under the table. Should I manage to do so and have any form of severe reaction that renders me unable to make logical decisions regarding my care, I hereby respectfully ask you to make such decisions for me. Just know that I would prefer death to merely existing, Should I return to the ship without it you can have me up on changes for going off ship without proper authority and any others you may wish to incorporate. Officer Colin Hanley"

"He, he clearly was aware of the dangers and risks and yet he was willing to go back down and confront the man on his own. I did not know him, Spock, but from what I had heard about him he was no drinker."

"Jim, I knew he would have the occasional beer but only ever one and it had to be cold. I recall hearing Mister Scott often say that he was good at getting them back from the pubs if they had imbibed a wee bit too much and how 'the lad would only have one cold beer and maintain a hold on the glass in such a way that people could nae tell it was empty for the rest of the time the rest of us enjoyed ourselves'." Kirk tried not to smile at Spock's version of Scotty's accent. "Mister Scott said that many times the local inhabitants accepted him as a local and that he was almost always in control of the situation. I was aware that that man was drinking strong alcohol and that he poured the first drink Hanley had from a different bottle to the one his own drink was poured from. I prefer not to think about what it and subsequent drinks could have done to him. I also do not fully understand his reasoning for going for it on his own when I should have gone with him."

Jim Kirk could see his friend was dwelling too much on what might not happen. "Well, Spock, after we deliver that book I am sure that you and he can discuss all that. We have permission to go to Vulcan. He may have heard what happened to you and,"

Spock turned back to face the computer then shook his head as he slowly turned off the screen, "No, Jim. I noticed the time of his recording and he recorded his message at the time I was being attacked. There was no way for him to have known about what transpired."

"Well that's another thing you can question him about." Kirk almost laughed as he saw an eyebrow arch.

"And what might that be, Captain?"

"Why, if he has any psychic powers and knew was happening." Spock gave a slight smiled and nodded, "But that can wait till we leave Vulcan."

"If I am correct in my thinking I believe that we may encounter some difficulty on Vulcan, Jim. As it has been several decades since there have been any toitak cases on Vulcan, actually, if memory serves, on any Federation planet, it is possible that the doctors and scientists may make application to have him remain should he be removed from the ship for examination in a Vulcan hospital. They could, without knowing and then contesting his rating, argue that he is an expendable member of the crew and they would be correct in that there are other ACT officers in Starfleet and they could also rightfully say he has no fixed duties aboard this ship."

 _ **Expendable** member of the crew_. Hearing his friend say that stopped him. So many times Kirk had thought that the Vulcan part of his friend understood that to him no crew member was expendable. He knew it was exactly how the scientists on Vulcan would think with toitak being so rare but for Spock to think it, to say it had taken him by surprise. Expendable. Just a flicker of real and total disappointment started in him till he looked at Spock and saw that his friend was studying him, saw that his friend was waiting for him to realize something.

 **Damn! Damn him**. That was why he was the best First Officer in the fleet. He was waiting for him, his Captain, to realize that that would be what the Vulcans would think, he was making him see how the Vulcans could and would want to get a hold of Officer Hanley and that he had to come up with a logical, irrefutable, and inarguable reason for Officer Hanley to remain on the ship. Kirk knew that Spock knew how he thought that no officer was expendable and had chosen that word to galvanize him. As he looked at his Vulcan friend he realized that no matter what his decision was that Spock would stand by him. If the Vulcans accessed his records they would know he had no fixed department and that would make him, in their eyes, expendable. His record. That was it! There were details on many officers' records that were classified and only the First Officer and Captain of the ship knew. Only he and Spock knew Hanley was one of the top two in his field, Adaptive Civilian Transactions, in the whole of Starfleet, thus making him not only not expendable but also an essential officer on the Enterprise and its mission of exploration. As usual Spock had known the answer but waited for him to think of it. He shook his head and thanked the deities for sending him such a special being as a friend and officer.

"First Officer," Kirk smiled at his friend, "am I correct in assuming that any officer who is classified as a specialist in Adaptive Civilian Transactions does not have fixed duties but is expected to be available to fit into almost any station on the ship if necessary while maintaining their readiness for deployment on planet-side activities?"

Spock nodded, "That is correctly worded, Captain, and correct. Specialists in Adaptive Civilian Transactions are highly sought as it takes years of exposure to a multitude of various forms of civilizations to be deployed without concern." From watching how his Captain and friend was reacting to what he was saying Spock knew that Kirk had not fully thought the situation through and was merely reacting, "Such officers are usually innately gifted with the ability to almost immediately blend in with the culture and ways of known civilizations and rapidly adapt to those newly encountered. They must be able to adapt for both short and extended periods of time off the ship ."

Extended periods of time. Kirk shook his head and briefly bit his bottom lip, _extended periods of time_ would mean he could be ordered to leave Officer Hanley on Vulcan. All that the Vulcans would have to do was put forward better reasoning for him to remain and, having had the debates he had had over the years with Spock, he knew that Vulcans only debated from a position of irrefutable reason and pure logic. Kirk shook his head. The thing that made Hanley so necessary for the ship, his adaptability, would be what could be used to take him off the ship. Taking a deep breath to steady himself he looked at Spock and asked the question he had already answered, "So, you believe that he would adapt to Vulcan if he has to leave the ship?"

* * *

A.N. Got a crazy few weeks coming up and will get back as/when I can.

Hope all who celebrate Easter or other religious festivals at this time of year have a good time. Thoughts of peace to the people of Belgium/Brussels.


	4. Chapter 4

"I have no doubt that he would adapt, Captain." When Spock was silent Kirk was aware there was something in the way he said it that made him look at his friend and saw him nod once, "On several occasions when he has found for myself, as well as for others, items we were unable to find anything about it has been simply because he could just blend in so well. I was assured by Mister Scott that Officer Hanley was quickly and easily accepted as a local after only a few hours yet would always be the one in control of the situation even though others might not really be aware of him doing so. He would be so accepted that often the locals would help him in ways they would not help us. You do realize that he would, of course, first need to be released from the ship, Sir."

Released? The words seemed to echo in Kirk's mind and he just looked at Spock as though he had just spoken in Vulcan not fully understanding what he was talking about.

"Yes, Jim, **officially released** from the ship that is."

Officially released. **That was it**. As he looked at Spock he saw what he had so often seen, what it was always oddly comforting to see, that quiet reassurance that he always found there. As Henley's commanding officer he could release him only through a directive from Command as Henley was a specialist in a limited field of expertise who had been assigned to his ship. To his ship and not to him as Hanley had been on the ship as a crewmember when he took command. While the Vulcans could approach Command about it he would tell Command of how it was due to having him aboard the ship that enabled the Vulcans to have returned to them that book and of all the other things he had done while on the ship that only he could do. Kirk nodded more to himself than to Spock as he realized that Command was not likely to release him as the Enterprise was often the ship of first contact with new life forms and civilizations and they needed an officer who could quickly and easily blend in with the general populous as Hanley had proven to be able to do. While he could not remember any particular time that Hanley had actually accompanied them on the initial beam down he was aware, as he was sure Spock was, of the many times Henley had gone down to a strange or new planet and come back with invaluable information just by talking with and mixing with the local inhabitants.

For a moment Kirk closed his eyes as he remembered what Spock had said about Mister Scott's comment regarding Hanley being in control of the situation and being accepted as a local. A real ACT officer, applying their skills and training as well as, Kirk was sure, some innate ability to mentally adjust to the and life by the mores of the society they integrate with while still retaining their own moral code. He also remembered Spock saying the man who had had the book had poured Hanley's drink from a different bottle than his own. Clearly the man knew what the drink could and would to do to another and, most likely, got some sort of enjoyment out of watching the person drink and seeing the reactions. Hanley had seemed fine till Spock had taken the box from him. It was as though holding onto the box was helping him hold onto reality.

"Do you believe I will be able to prevent having to deal with such a request from Command?"

"If I may make a suggestion it may be a wise preemptive action to notify Command that they may receive a request to remove Officer Hanley from the ship by some of Vulcan's leading scientists, but done through the proper lines of communications, purely to study him because of the possibility he did ingest some toitak. It might also be wise to point out that it was because of his being a highly experienced ACT officer and assigned to this ship that enabled him to secure and help return a Vulcan artifact of great significance to Vulcan. The specialists on Vulcan will not make any requests until they have verified that it is toitak and by then Command would have your report."

"Command just might, to appease the Vulcans, let them,"

"Jim, the Vulcan Ambassador has said he would speak with the Elders about the book and the cost paid by Officer Hanley in recovering it and how it is best he remain on the ship. I am certain with them supporting the Ambassador's belief that Doctor McCoy is best suited to care for him that the Healers would only ask Command to ensure they got copies of McCoy's findings which I am sure the Ambassador would be given by Doctor McCoy upon request and with Officer Hanley's permission."

It was the way Spock had said _the Vulcan Ambassador_ that made Kirk stop for a moment. If Sarek believed that McCoy was the best suited to care for Hanley then Kirk knew he had one major ally in keeping Hanley on the Enterprise. If Sarek talked with the Elders and got them to all understand that Hanley would be served best on the ship by a Human doctor who understood the Human body better they might help him point out to the Healers how the patient's well-being was more important than anything new that they might learn about toitak. While the title of being an Ambassador might not mean much to Vulcans Kirk knew it was the lineage and work done for Vulcans by the family over the generations that gave Sarek so much influence and power. There were those who did not like Spock but accepted that he was Sarek's son and heir, they most likely would not support anything Spock proposed but they would most likely find it difficult to turn down a request from Sarek.

"How," for a moment Kirk bit his bottom lip unsure if he should even voice this then, looking at those friendly dark eyes of that accepting face he continued, "do you think the Elders will react if McCoy does not let them at least see Hanley? You know how protective he can be."

Kirk saw an eyebrow start to raise, "Captain. I admit it took me some time to fully understand it but I am well aware of the reason so many of the crew say he is like a she-cat protecting her kittens, however, I also know that Doctor McCoy is not one to not share knowledge and, as long has he were given the final say of how long the Elders could visit Officer Hanley, I can see no reason why he would not allow them at least see him. We will know in nine days, fourteen,"

"I forgot to tell you I have had our speed increased to warp six, therefore, we will at Vulcan in four days. Do you know what you will say to the Elders about the book, about Hanley? "

Kirk saw the start of the smile that it seemed Spock only shared with him, "Jim, I do not even know what I will say to my father. He asked about how I knew Hanley and how he knew about the book. It may be best if I see Hanley first, if I learn more about him than I already know."

"You're read his file."

"But that is not all there is to him, Jim. Like I said earlier, I have not paid all that much attention to those who are rotated into the Science Division who do not express an intention of remaining in the Division. As we both know what others know about us is often not on those files nor even on reports about events. Consider what we, you and I, know about one another that is not known by others."

"You cannot just,"

"All I will do is ask a few of the crew who are known to associate the most with him about his interests and if they can give me some insight into his interests and not only how he tends to be like off the ship but also if he had any valid reasons for all that he did."

Kirk smiled as he knew how often Spock found making casual conversation very awkward, how he preferred exactness and correct terminology to casual language and approximations. He almost laughed as he pictured his Vulcan friend going up to any of the crew and asking them about Hanley without it sounding like an inquisition, "Do you even know who associates the most with him?"

Spock shook his head and looked at his Captain and friend, "No, but I am certain that Lieutenant Uhura is sure to be able to enlighten me as to who would be best to ask. I have been aware of the two of them often singing together in the recreation room and playing as a team in various word game championships as well as games involving linguistics I have almost seen him and Mister Sulu dueling with various swords and I have seen him assisting Mister Scott when it was clear that Mister Scott had been suffering the effects of imbibing excessive amounts of alcohol."

Kirk shook his head, "I did not know even that much about him. Oh, I had noticed him around the ship but that is about all. I was aware he had often been on early landing parties on new planets and came back with rare samples of scientific interest and images of things of cultural interest to the inhabitants as well as information that was useful in our talks with the leaders, that he blended in well, but just never really thought that much about it."

"I will go see Doctor McCoy for an update on Officer Hanley's status before going back to my station on the Bridge, Captain. When my shift ends I will inform my father of our earlier arrival. If you will excuse me." There was something in the way he said it that let Kirk know his friend wanted to go alone to see McCoy and he understood. He would also stop by to check with McCoy but more about what might be to come than just on how Hanley was faring. If Spock was right about the Vulcan healers wanting to study him because of that toitak then he better learn all he could about it and about Hanley so he might stand a chance of keeping him on the ship. He was sure Sarek would help but he could use more information on his side.

The more he thought about it the more Kirk was sure that there had also been something more in the way his Vulcan friend had said _the Vulcan Ambassador_ has said he would speak with the Elders than he had first thought. For a moment Kirk closed his eyes as he realized it was something that gave a slight indication as to how this would be seen as a serious matter on Vulcan with the Healers and the Elders possibly going to be at loggerheads about the chance to thoroughly study a person clearly effected by toitak while respecting all that that person did for all of Vulcan by getting that book. It was the way he had been so formal and not said _my father_ , it had been the way he distanced himself as though Sarek was some superior being preparing for a fight.

While Spock has not said so Kirk knew that, from how Vulcans did not like mysteries and how they had clearly not had a case of toitak poisoning, or whatever it was that Officer Hanley had, for a long time that the Healers would put up a good case to get him off the ship for study. The higher echelon at Command was keen to keep the Vulcans on side and might think of giving them Hanley if there was any risk of the Vulcans causing any disruption. He had to think of what he could say to keep him aboard. There had to be something and yet everything he could think of he knew the Vulcans would find some flaw in. Even the fact that Hanley was an ACT officer would mean little to them compared to studying what toitak was doing to Hanley. Somehow, possibly from their only meeting and all he had gleaned from Spock either verbally or in his actions, Kirk was certain behind that pure Vulcan exterior of calm was a restless mind that demanded, and expected, fairness and respect for all beings.

When Spock walked into Sickbay McCoy let him walk up to the bed Officer Hanley was on and left him standing the, just looking at Hanley. So many times he had seen the Vulcan like this when he had come to see one of the bridge crew when they had had an accident but not when he had come in to see regular crew. Having studied the Vulcan as often has he had it was easy to see that what had happened to Hanley, and what he was still enduring, was clearly effecting those emotions Spock would deny having. Somehow that blasted Vulcan would be blaming himself for all that pain.

"He's getting a blended painkiller, Spock. Whatever is playing havoc with his systems took me a bit of time to find a painkiller that would not react with it. There was a substance in his systems that even our most advanced medical analyzer cannot give a specific diagnostic analysis. It has given me fifteen possibilities." Spock heard the frustration that was clear about the way McCoy looked at him then at Hanley. He heard almost resignation in the long sigh McCoy had before the doctor looked back at him, "I only hope the Vulcan Healers know more than that blasted computer does."

"You do realize they will want to take him off the ship? That they will want to fully study him away from the ship."

"There is no way they are going to get my patient off this ship." Spock saw the determination in the blue eyes and a challenge, "And you cannot make me change,"

"I have spoken with the Captain,"

"Oh, so **you've already spoken to him** to get him to, to," McCoy could feel anger building him as he thought of Spock going to Kirk first. Surely the Vulcan knew by now he could have come to him first.


	5. Chapter 5

"As I was saying, Doctor, I have spoken with the Captain to tell him that the Vulcan Ambassador will be talking with both the Healers to find out about toitak as well as to the Elders about how you are the best physician to care for Hanley and that the Enterprise is, therefore, the most logical place for him to be cared for.'

For a moment there was confusion about the eyes and then Spock saw how McCoy crossed his arms and rocked on his heels, "You spoke to the Vulcan Ambassador, did you? I imagine your father took some persuasion to,"

"Doctor, I merely explained to him how I know very little about Officer Hanley and even less about how he got the book. **It was he who first** mentioned talking with the Elders and the Healers and it was **his decision** to ask the Healers about toitak without mentioning Office Hanley or the book to them and **he will be sending to you any information he is able to get from them regarding treatment.** " Spock saw how McCoy's posture changed and how about the eyes was an almost startled look, "I believe his exact words regarding you and caring for patients were, ' _Having experienced Doctor McCoy's form of medical practice I can attest that the officer would find no better care than on the ship under his care._ ' He is also going to speak with the Elders when he returns the book to them and I am certain he will inform them that Officer Hanley should remain on the ship."

"And you think the Elders will really care about Hanley more than the book?"

"They will care more about the book and its return, Doctor, as that is only logical when you consider its importance and significance to all of Vulcan. However they will care about the safety and well-being of the one who paid such a high price for its return and they will, no doubt, have questions about him that are not medically related."

McCoy had been watching Spock and had noticed the way he glanced away from him to look at Hanley for a bit longer than McCoy expected him to but then saw a slight nod before the Vulcan looked back at him and McCoy had clearly heard the slight change in his voice as he had said _"not medically related_ " and realized how much his Vulcan friend detested anybody asking questions about his life and how he, therefore, respected the privacy of others far more than he had noticed other Vulcans doing. "Well, I have spent a lot of time with him so if you need to know the likes of his hobbies and basic interests I could help you out there. Think you should also talk with Sulu about him as they have spent a lot of time together as has Uhura."

"I had thought of contacting others who would have had more contact with him than I have had but had not been certain how to approach them. Your offer of assistance is greatly appreciated, Doctor I will contact Mister Sulu and Lieutenant Uhura to see if they would care to tell me what they know of Officer Hanley away from the ship."

"I've got a better idea," McCoy walked over to his desk and flicked a switch, "Uhura, could you and Sulu come down now to Sickb ay for about fifteen minutes? There is something I need to discuss with the two of you."

"We will be down in about three, our relief's can take over for that long as we are in clear space."

McCoy turned and looked at the First Officer and smiled, "If you do not find out all you want to after we all talk then you still have plenty of time to find out from others whatever else you feel you need to know. I often find when you have two or three people talking about another person or event you learn more as they will remember different things or different ways of seeing things."

"Once again I appreciate your involvement, Doctor, and your taking this action will be of great assistance in supplying me with information I might need when I have to face the Elders."

"You seem a tad nervous about that. Surely your father will be there to,"

"My father will be there strictly as the head of the clan, Doctor. He knows even less about Officer Hanley than I did before this event commenced. It will be up to me to make some sense to them of a matter I do not, myself, fully understand. I am finding it difficult to think how I will explain why and how Hanley did what he did as it was not because I am a senior officer nor are we what could be called friends. He left a message for me that stated only he was returning to the planet as he had heard that a local had something stolen from Vulcan that he would try and get back. There was no reason for his,"

"Spock, for somebody so damned smart, and as intelligent, as you there are times when you can be so **blastedly stupid**. He has been on this ship long enough to know how proud you are of your Vulcan heritage and he would know that anybody who had it would not give it to a Vulcan. You have to know that you are possibly the only Vulcan he knows and that he knew you would see that it is returned to where it rightfully belongs."

Before Spock could respond Uhura and Sulu walked in and looked at them before Uhura said, "You wanted to see us, Doctor."

"Yes, well, Spock has a meeting coming up with the Vulcan Elders and they will most likely ask him some questions about Officer Hanley and while Spock knows about his professional side he needs a bit more about his life off-duty and I just thought you two could tell him about that."

Uhura smiled as she nodded, "He is the ideal male escort when female crew have some time off ship and want to just walk around, he is around and watching over you without you really being aware he is there. He is complimentary yet will also tell a female officer how her civilian attire might get the sort of attraction she does not want or that she looks better in a different color or style. You may have noticed how on their birthday every officer gets a small anonymous present from him to do with their interests, sometimes handmade. When he laughs it is real and comes from deep inside him. He reads a lot on a variety of subjects, likes almost all kinds of music and is a very good dancer and ballad singer. "

Sulu looked at him and Spock saw the honesty in the man's eyes when he said, "With all due respect, Sir, if it came to a fight where he was protecting one of us against a full Vulcan I firmly believe he would kill the Vulcan or the Vulcan would have to kill him as he would not yield. When he makes up his mind to do something, like protect somebody or get something, I doubt if he knows how or when to stop until that goal is reached. I have found that he is highly skilled in several of the martial arts yet he also has a great appreciation for the cultural arts as well, apart from not being fond of certain foods. Like Uhura said, you could go out on a new planet and feel safe as he would be watching even if you did not see him as he would just blend in with the local inhabitants. He's from a six generation long line of front line hidden protectors, has a brother who is a doctor and a sister who is a teacher and grew up with a lot of different animals as pets although he always liked the herding breeds of dogs. His mother was a veterinarian and his father was a first responder. For all his seriousness he has a great sense of humor and can laugh at himself."

"Oh yes, if you want to know a funny thing about him, he seems to be able to adapt very well to almost anything yet if you ever want to see him almost panic and be totally at a loss for words all you need to do is take him a bowl of chocolate and peppermint ice cream. He will be his usual calm self but seem to suddenly be unable to talk coherently and physically backs away from it. For some reason he is almost terrified of it." Uhura shook her head, "He wouldn't say why but it is well known so nobody eats it around him." . .

For a moment Spock just looked at the two of them as he mentally sorted through what they had told him and saw how it added depth to what he had known about Hanley. "Do either of you know of what reason Officer Hanley would have had for drinking an excessively alcoholic liquid to procure a book for me as I am aware he did not drink strong alcoholic beverages?"

For just a moment Uhura and Sulu looked at each other and Spock had known them for long enough to know that a silent conversation was going. Uhura nodded and Sulu looked at him, "All he would have to know, Sir, was that the book was of great importance to you for any reason and he would do whatever he could to get it for you."

"That is similar to what Doctor McCoy told me yet such an action is illogical as I have had very few dealings with him over all the time I have been on the ship."

"Oh, Mister Spock," Uhura laughed, "Colin Hanley can be far more logical than you at times and at other times he is the most illogical being alive. If some action seems the right thing to do to him then there is no way of stopping him except to stun him to the point of nearly killing him. To him what he did seemed logical and, when he recovers, it will please him to know that he was successful. You must know that it would make him most uncomfortable if you or anybody makes what he did anything more than him succeeding at what he set out to do, in doing what he felt he had to do. As Sulu said, he obviously heard about the book and with it being of significance to Vulcans and you being not only Vulcan but a member of the crew he would have thought it of importance for you to have it."

"It would be most difficult to tell my father and the Elders that. Had I mentioned the book to Hanley and told him of its significance to Vulcan it would have been different as they would accept it as a recovery but I did not mention the book to him so they will see it, as I did, as most illogical."

"So," McCoy looked at him, "you no longer think his action was illogical?"

"As I just stated, Doctor, I did see it as most illogical. I still am not ready to believe it was the most logical action he could have taken but I am beginning to understand him and therefore his actions better."

"The way he gets around on planets, the way he so easily mingles almost unnoticed by the local inhabitants, if he heard of a stolen book or stolen anything from Vulcan he would think of you, think it was of importance to you, and think of how to get it for you. Surely your father would understand that."

"My father, even after all these years of being married to a very Human woman, having had me as a son, and dealing with Humans, does not understand such actions and, as I just stated, at the moment I do not understand his reasoning either. He took a great risk."

"That's just it, Spock." McCoy crossed his arms and looked steadily at him and Spock saw the slight nod the doctor game him, " **He** did it. **He** knowingly took the risk. **He** was willing to do it and to question his reasoning is, in a way, an insult. Just accept that it was something he felt he had to do. As you surely know, and your father will know, Human feelings often have little to do with logic."

For a moment Spock looked at each of his three friends then back at McCoy, "I believe that is what I will tell him, Doctor. I wish to thank the three of you for your help in this matter."

"Any time, Mister Spock." Sulu and Uhura almost said in unison as they nodded first at Spock and then at McCoy as they left.

Slowly Spock walked from McCoy's office to stand beside the bed and look down at Hanley and McCoy left him for a moment, seeing something in the way the Vulcan was standing he knew meant the man wanted time alone there to think. He knew that that blasted Vulcan would be blaming himself for what had happened but that, given time, he would also see that it was the way Hanley was, that there was nothing else Hanley could or would have done. McCoy also knew that Spock knew enough about the registers to know that Hanley was still experiencing a great deal of pain.

"Bridge to Sickbay."

"Sickbay here. What is it, Jim?"

* * *

A/N Yo-yo weather at the moment - one day very warm and sunny then the next is a very wet and cold day. Thanks for reading. Enjoy. HAVE FUN!


	6. Chapter 6

"If Spock is still there could you send him to my quarters? I think it best I talk with him there."

"He's here and I'll send him along."

"Thanks. Kirk out."

McCoy walked over to stand by Spock who still stood looking down at Hanley and McCoy knew that what he saw about the eyes of that so-called emotionless Vulcan was guilt, blame, and a lot of uncertainty. "Spock, I,"

"I shall leave shortly and go see the Captain in his quarters, Doctor. There has been no change in his heartrate nor in his rate and depth of breathing. Clearly the toitak is only affecting his brain. If memory serves it is recorded that when a Vulcan patient lasted less than this long in the condition he is in it was called what would translate into Standard as sleeping death. It was recorded that the breathing rate and depth of the patient did not change for several days before," for a moment Spock closed his eyes and McCoy saw the slight shaking of his head.

"He's still there, Spock, he is still fighting." gently McCoy placed his hand on the Vulcan's shoulder and gave a squeeze, "There has been no downward indications on his cranial readings, a few spikes to show awareness when I have massaged his arms and legs and when one of the nurses brushed his hair. He is still there."

"Perhaps," there was a change in the tone, some optimism, "It was recorded that a slow but noticeable decline in brainwave activity over several days was noticed with all patient who died and that there was no reaction to any sort of outside stimulation." When Spock looked at him McCoy saw from how he now stood straighter than he had a few moments ago when looking down at Hanley, "I believe you are correct, Doctor, I believe he is still with us and fighting. I will be with the Captain should there be any change."

As soon as Spock entered Kirk's quarters Kirk said, "How is,"

"Officer Hanley is still with us and getting the **best possible care** he would get **anywhere** as McCoy is with him." Spock looked at his friend and Captain and saw confusion and doubt about how he stood, "You did not ask to see me just about that, did you?"

"No," Kirk slowly walked around his desk and sat down, indicating that Spock should sit in the chair across the desk from him and waited for him to sit, "Do you have any idea **what I can expect** from meeting with the Ambassador, the Elders, and the Healers? I had a message stating that upon arrival you and I are to with them regarding the book and Hanley and I would like to be a bit prepared. We are to see them and you are to give them the book that your father will keep in safekeeping for some ceremony. McCoy will remain on the ship with Hanley and we will come back to the ship with your father, the Elders, and some Healers for a brief visit to Sickbay so they can see the condition Hanley is in."

If Kirk had not been looking at his Vulcan friend and had not known the slight changes in his expressions he would have missed the tell-tale sign of the slight twitch in his friend's upper lip before he spoke, "There could be any number of possible expectations, Captain. While at first I thought it unusual for both the Elders and some Healers to be present and to come aboard to see Hanley there are the blessings to be done which will require their presence. Do you know where we are to meet with them?"

"We are being met by the Ambassador and your mother at their home and then he will notify them of our arrival. You will have the book and hand it to," Kirk hesitated for a moment and saw the slightest of smiles on his friend's face.

"In private we should refer to him as my father. I only referred to him as the Vulcan Ambassador to stress the importance of the book to Vulcan and what an honour it will be for him to be able to return it to where it belongs."

"But surely as you,"

"I am the son of the Vulcan Ambassador, Jim. It is not my place to hand it to the Elders. It was my duty to keep looking for it while upholding my duties to Starfleet. You know that Vulcans have many ways that are different from Human ways and in Vulcan society the eldest or only son is expected to be his father's representative in all things related to his father and his father's position within Vulcan society when the father is unable to do so." For a moment Spock just looked at him then steepled his fingers and looked over them at Kirk, "Logically, if we were to follow the Human way with regard to returning the book, would it not have been the duty of Officer Hanley to do so as he did find and retrieve it."

"You still look troubled about something, Spock. What? Maybe I can help."

"I am still unsure as to what my father or the Elders might want to know about Officer Hanley. While I am fully aware of his career on the Enterprise I am still at a loss as to how to reply should they ask about him outside of his role on the ship. Although Mister Sulu and Lieutenant Uhura as well as Doctor McCoy have given me some information as to what he is like as Humans would say out-of-uniform I am not certain as to what they will expect me to know about him. I am also reflecting on a look he gave me when he entered that establishment and looked at me. There was the slightest of a nod of his head and calmness about his eyes. Only after having read that message he left me do I understand and am having difficulty accepting his trust in me, his almost certain belief that he would get that book but suffer some sort of negative reaction to whatever he had to do. I am also unsure of what I can do for him that will let him know how I appreciate what he did for me."

"What he did for you? What do you mean by that, Spock? He did it," Kirk knew his Vulcan friend found many actions that the rest of the crew thought of as normal to be anything but a normal thing to do. Over the years he had helped him understand some of the actions but knew that there were many that to the Vulcan were illogical.

"Because he possibly knows that Vulcans have a digestive system that is unable to process liquids that have a high alcoholic content, that it is known such drinks can cause death, and, Jim, he did it in my place. There was a calm acceptance about him as he walked over to drink that liquor. He must have been aware of the significance of the man not drinking from the same bottle the man poured his drink from and yet he drank it. He drank it and clearly drank him, as you Humans say, under the table. He did that for me and for Vulcan and I do not know how I should react to such an action as I have no real connection with him other than him being a shipmate. Both Mister Sulu and Lieutenant Uhura have told me it is the sort of action he would have found logical but I fail to see how he could have found it to be that. He did not really know me other than as a senior officer, as a senior officer who was the head of a division he would be working in for sixteen weeks, a senior officer who had had four weeks of those sixteen to get to know him yet who had, to my chagrin, largely ignored him and, as we were off the ship and on off-duty time, he had no reason to do what he did, especially as that message indicated he was aware that such an action could result in his incapacitation which makes his action most illogical. I," Spock closed his eyes and bowed his head as he fought to control his uncertainty, "I do not believe I will be able to answer the questions my father and the Elders might ask me about him.'

A quick response came to Kirk but he knew it would not only confuse the Vulcan even more but would not be approved in Vulcan culture. For a moment he was silent so he looked at his friend, only having known the Vulcan as long as he had enabled him to see the turmoil he was in, "If they do then you tell them what you know of him, Spock. All you have to do to answer their question, unless they ask for specific details, is tell them his career since you have known of him. There is no need for them to know more than that unless they ask for specific information and then it is for you and you alone to decide if they need to know it or only want to know it."

"If I were to tell them that he had worked in my Division for four weeks they would expect me to know more about him and his abilities."

"From what you told me you noticed when he was in your division he has very good skills in both applied physical science and anatomical science, you said you had received twenty-eight very favorable reports about his work and that you found most of his reports to be exceptionally detailed and reflecting many possibilities for various outcomes, some of which you mentioned you might explore further. You let them know that you do not spend all your time in the Science Division as you have other duties as my First Officer."

Spock slightly smiled at him, "You know only a small amount of what is expected of a Vulcan in my position, Jim. I am the son of the Vulcan Ambassador, the sole heir in a leading clan, the first issue of a Human and Vulcan mating, and am also the first Vulcan serving as First Officer on a predominantly Human ship. And the fact that the Enterprise is largely the first ship of contact with new worlds only adds to my duties to Vulcan."

"Okay, we can deal with all that when we arrive but I need to know what to expect. My last meeting with T-Pau was not the best and she is the only high ranking Vulcan I have had any sort of dealings with apart from your father and a bit of information would be helpful. What sort of reception do you think we will receive and how can I best prepare for meeting them?"

Spock allowed some of the merriment he felt show in his face as he looked at his friend. Here was a man who he had seen confront and defeat or overcome some of the worst possible threats the universe could present him with and yet he was almost terrified of Vulcan formality. For a moment he found himself thankful that McCoy would not be there but then remembered Jim had said the Healers and Elders would come aboard to see Hanley.

Kirk had seen the slight amusement about on his friend's face, "What, Spock?"

"Nothing serious, Jim. I was just reflecting on how you have far less to concern yourself with when it comes to dealing with Vulcans but I think we both best be present and with the Healers when they come aboard to see Hanley. I am not sure as to how the good doctor will react to having so many in his Sickbay." Studying Kirk as he talked Spock saw the flash of a smile then a look of concern and a sudden realization, "You have not told McCoy yet of the visit by the Healers?"

"No, I thought I would talk it through with you first. Find out what I have to confront before I let myself think of that hornet's nest."

"Hornet's nest? I fail to see how Doctor McCoy meeting with the Elders can be in any way reflective of a eusocial wasp's habitation."

Kirk laughed and shook his head, "Oh, it is an old Earth saying, Spock. A hornet's nest was thought of as a pile of trouble and if you were to stir it you angered the whole hive and were likely to be badly stung by the angry hornets. When I tell McCoy what I have done I will really be stirring up a hornet's nest."

"So," Spock liked at Kirk and smiled, "You are afraid of how McCoy will react to them just arriving in his area and wanting to see his patient?"

"I would not say **afraid** , Spock." Kirk smiled back and saw an eyebrow raise and he nodded, "It is more like **terrified**. You know how he would hold it against me till he could get his own back on me in some way; you know how he seeks and gets his not so subtle revenge on us."

"Only too well, Jim. If you will excuse me I best prepare for the coming meetings."

"Thanks for your help, my friend. I also will prepare for the coming few days. We will arrive at your parents' place in two days."

 **Two days.** Spock sat quietly thinking over the past encounters he had had with Hanley and the wide range of questions the Elders and Healers could and most likely would ask about Hanley. In that message Hanley had asked him to make decisions for him should he be unable to and Spock knew **he had to and would protect** Hanley from the Healers as he knew only too well from personal experience how they treated unusual patients and he would not allow that to happen to Hanley. He wondered if Hanley had any idea of how he felt to know he had been so close to the book and knowing he could not get it for his people. He wondered if Hanley had any idea as to how it honored him and his house to be able to return the book to where it belonged. Words from that message Hanley had sent him came back to him and Spock thought of the great deal of trust in him Hanley had revealed _"I hereby respectfully ask you to make such decisions for me. Just know that I would prefer death to merely existing,"_

Talking with his friend and Captain had helped him to think over the coming events. Most of the coming ceremony would be in Vulcan and he would translate it for Jim afterwards. He would also be sure to stand near Hanley and McCoy and between them and the Healers on the ship but would allow them to approach Hanley. He was sure McCoy would allow the Elders to approach Hanley but knew there would be a confrontation should the Healers attempt to get too close to Hanley. He also knew that as Jim was not going to tell McCoy about him allowing the Healers on the ship to see Hanley that he would. For a moment he paused as he realized it was not to stop McCoy from seeking any sort of revenge on Jim but to give him time to prepare himself and Hanley. He sent a copy of Hanley's message to McCoy computer with a coded lock on it so that McCoy could not open it till he arrived.

When he walked into McCoy's office it was obvious the Doctor had tried to open the message and was a tad annoyed. He just stood looking from Spock to his computer with his arms tightly crossed over his chest and, as soon as Spock walked into the room said, "What the blazes is so **damned important** I had to wait till you got here?"

"Doctor, I am sure that once you read the message I received and **calmly listen to me** you will understand the reason for such an action on my part."

"Okay, okay, just open it."

For a moment McCoy just stood still with his head bowed and his eyes closed after he read the message. Another officer who had seen behind that Vulcan wall and seen the being behind it. Slowly he looked up and saw, for a moment, a hint of concern behind those dark eyes. "I do not know if the Captain has told you what is to happen in the next few days."

"I know we are going to Vulcan to return that book."

"We will be first going to my parent's house where Jim and I will meet with my father, the Elders, and the Healers and hand over the book. Jim has talked with my father who is acting as the Ambassador of Vulcan with regard to returning the book. Jim has agreed to some Elders and **a few Healers aboard the ship to see Officer Hanley."**

" **HE, HE, HE WHAT? LIKE HELL THEY WILL!** Doesn't he," McCoy started to reach out to his computer to contact Kirk but Spock gripped his hand and McCoy looked at the Vulcan, suddenly ready to rage at him as he would at Kirk later but saw a look of understanding about the face of the being he thought of as a friend. " **You, you agree with him?"**

* * *

The seasonal war is going on here with one day nice and sunny and mild then that icy southerly laden with rain blows in. At least I have the gardens almost all ready for the gradual onset of winter. Just have the vegetable beds to get ready - so far my new Border Collie does not know how to dig up and chew/eat carrots like my last one did. Hope all is with with you all. Thanks for reading.


	7. Chapter 7

"They will be able to see Officer Hanley, Doctor."

Fury he wasnot aware he could feel swept over him as he realized what must have been behind letting the Vulcan Healers come see his patient, "Why, why **you green-blooded** ,"

" **THINK ,** Doctor, **think**. Jim has told them that they would be **able to see him** and they will **be able to see him.** You must know, Leonard, that there is no way they will not get close to him as **I will be standing between them and Officer Hanley**. I have too many memories of what they are like in their examinations of those who are different or of interest and they will not do that to him. Doctor, **we will allow them to see him** but Jim said nothing about them being able to examine him nor from what distance they would see him and **I will not allow them to get close to him.** "

Leonard. McCoy shook his head as he looked at his Vulcan friend. The way he had said Leonard, his given name, had caught him off guard, had let him know how very serious Spock was about not letting the Healers close to Hanley. He smiled, "Why you green-blooded cunning little devil. You and your exactness about what was said. I'm sorry, Spock, I,"

"There is no reason to apologize, Doctor. Do you not believe, as I do, that we, you and I, have known one another long enough to know when the other has said what they do not mean at their core but have merely spoken reactively?"

"Reactively, huh?" McCoy smiled, rocked briefly on his heels as he shook his head, then smiled, "Guess it is a polite way of saying emotionally." He looked at his friend and saw understanding and acceptance in the dark eyes, "Deep within me and to my depths I know and believe it, Spock, but sometimes I forget, especially when I let my human emotions take over my reasoning. As long as you are there with me I will allow them to see him. As you say, Jim did say they could see him, nothing about examining him. Any idea when that is likely to happen?"

"We will arrive at Vulcan in two days. We hand the book over, there will be a short ceremony that only my father and I will go to as the book is returned to its rightful place, they will come aboard, and we should be clear in four days. I would imagine that my father and Jim were talking about the events to occur and my father used semantics to get Kirk to agree to such an event. While on the topic of my parents I would be surprised if my mother did not insist in having the bridge crew visit for a meal and allow those of the crew who wish to have time off the ship be allowed to do so."

McCoy smiled and nodded his head as he looked at Spock, "Somehow, Spock, I have no doubt, having met your mother, that if she wants that to happen that it will. I think all those years on Vulcan and married to your father has made her a very strong woman who knows how to get her way."

Spock saw the warmth and laughter in his friend's eyes, "My mother can be a very formidable woman at times."

After Spock had left Kirk sat thinking about the arrangements that had been made and knew that he really should tell McCoy what he had arranged but knew it would be, as he had told Spock, like stirring a hornet's nest. He knew how protective McCoy was of his patients and how he did not like the way Vulcans practiced medicine so he would not be at all pleased if his Captain just walked in with a group of Vulcan Healers to see Officer Hanley. What he had not told Spock as he did not want his Vulcan friend to know how he was out manoeuvred by his father on that, how Sarek had, like Spock, been able to get him to agree to something before he had had time to think along the lines of how Vulcans would interpret his responses. They had talked about the uniqueness of toitak and the next he knew Sarek was saying how grateful the Healers would be to know that they would be allowed on the Enterprise to see Hanley.

" _Coward. Coward._ " The tiny voice echoed in his mind as the thought of how McCoy could or would react. Slowly he stood up and knew he had to go and tell him. He would have eighteen hours to recover from whatever McCoy said and be prepared to meeting with Sarek, the Elders, and the Healers.

He walked in just as Spock said, "My mother can be a very formidable woman at times."

McCoy looked at him, "Spock here was just saying that we might be able to visit with his folks while on Vulcan."

Kirk looked at his First Officer. saw how relaxed he seemed, and silently cursed as he had hoped, when he had first seen him standing there talking with McCoy, that he had told him about the Healers.

"Once official duties are finished I suspect we will have time for a visit. Did Spock tell you what we have to do?"

McCoy nodded, smiling to himself as he saw how tense Kirk was, clearly afraid of him reacting the way he had with Spock, "Yes, he told me that you two take the book down, that there is some sort of ceremony, you come aboard, was usual, with a few guests to show around, and that we leave in about four days. Oh," for a moment Kirk tensed, "and he mentioned that we may have a visit with his parents and that his mother would want the crew who wanted to stretch their legs to have some time planet-side."

"Nothing else about what is to happen."

" **No** ," McCoy glanced at Spock for a moment then looked back at Kirk, "I am fairly sure that was all. You mean he has **forgotten something**? You mean he **failed to tell me** something important that you two talked about? What?"

"It's," Kirk steeled himself for what he knew was going to come but still, in desperation, looked at the one being who usually helped him in situations like this, "Go on, Spock, tell him what we were talking about."

"If you insist, Captain."

"I do, **tell him**."

"That Captain and I talked about," momentarily Kirk closed his eyes then looked right at McCoy steeling himself for McCoy's reaction, "the nests of eusocial wasp's and how mentioning certain matters would be his stirring up such a structure although it is matter itself, as it would be spoken of, would not physically be able to stir such a structure. If memory serves the nests of most warps are made of wood that the wasp has chewed into a pulp to,"

While he could not deny they had talked about that it had not been what he had wanted Spock to say. " **Gawddammit Spock** , I mean about the Healers coming aboard the ship to see Officer Hanley."

"The what are what, Jim?" from how Spock slightly raised his eyebrow for the briefest of moments while he had Kirk's full attention McCoy knew Spock Knew he was enjoying playing dumb, " **What the devil were you thinking**?"


	8. Chapter 8

"Look, Bones, think of the good relationships the Federation has with Vulcan and how to not invite them on the ship to see him could be seen as a slight. **I didn't mean for it to happen**. Sarek and I were talking and the next thing I realized he was accepting an invitation to come aboard with them to see Hanley. I mean I could hardly say No to the Vulcan Ambassador, could I, Bones?" McCoy was finding it difficult to not laugh, "Can you at least try to understand how difficult it was? Can you at least try to be civil to them and not start a war?"

"If Spock is with me all the time they are here and not with you I would be able to control myself long enough without causing a galactic war breaking out."

Spock cleared his throat, "I am sure you are aware, Doctor McCoy, that I will have other duties and will be unable to, as you Humans say, hold your hand while they are aboard. I am sure the Captain will,"

Kirk knew Spock was trying to get out of helping McCoy, "Your Captain, Spock, wants you to assist McCoy in any way you can while they are aboard the ship."

"Is, is that an order, Captain?"

"If you want me to make it an order," Kirk knew of how Spock adhered as much as possible to the Vulcan way and having him in with McCoy to keep him calm when the Healers were in Sickbay most likely was not what would be expected of him but without him in with McCoy there was not telling what McCoy would do. "Yes, Mister Spock, **that is an official order**. When the Vulcan Healers are aboard the Enterprise you are to be in Sickbay with Doctor McCoy and you are to assist him with the case, safety, and welfare of Officer Hanley."

It was not until he saw the looks exchanged between McCoy and Spock that he felt unsure about the order. Then he saw the nod they gave each other before McCoy's smile let him know something else had been discussed before he arrived.

"Well, Jim, another case of like father like son as Spock needed you to order him to help me and you just did that for him."

For a moment Kirk was confused and looked at his Vulcan First Officer, "Spock?"

"Jim, while actually on the planet of my birth I must be what I was raised to be and do my duties as per my linage and most likely future role as the leader of our clan as well as an Ambassador. On the ship, and under your orders, I must be what I choose to be. I wish to thank you, Jim, for that order as it will enable me to assist Doctor McCoy to assist Officer Colin Hanley for as long as we both believe that Hanley requires my assistance."

"Wait a minute," Kirk looked from one to the other and saw the same satisfied look on both faces and realized more had taken place before he arrived than a discussion about hornets' nests. "You two, you two planned this, didn't you?"

"Jim, planning indicates careful thought, an analysis of the many possibilities and the difficulties. I cannot speak for Doctor McCoy but I saw you giving me that order the best way to be present should Officer Hanley regain full consciousness as I would like to be present should that occur."

Should. Kirk looked at McCoy, "Should?"

"There are so many unknowns about toitak, Jim. I have never encountered it and there is very little about it since the last medical notes on it are over two hundred years old. The Vulcans were the last to have any recorded history of having had experience with it and that was also generations back in their history. There is no telling what will happen, if he will remain like that, die, or regain consciousness. And, if he does regain consciousness, to what level. Spock explained to me how it was called the sleeping death. For now it should be enough that he is still with us." McCoy looked at Spock, "Spock had told me that you were going to let them see him and I reacted. He made me accept what you had done. It will be steadying for me to have him there."

There was silence for a moment as Kirk looked at his two friends in almost a stunned state as they had worked together against him and as McCoy and Spock looked at each other as though realizing just how well they really knew each other and meshed together. McCoy nodded and looked back at Kirk, "I also thought being here for Hanley would be what would be best for both Spock and for Hanley. It would also make things easier for me as I would not have to be interrogated by Spock later."

"So, Doctor, you had an ulterior motive?"

"You seem to always have one whenever you have specifically asked for me to assist you so I decided to see what you thought of it being done to you." McCoy nodded, "You know, it is less of a hassle to have that ulterior motive. Might try it again on you one day."

For a moment Kirk was going to interrupt till he realized, after seeing it happen so many times before, that it was their way of agreeing to an action, agreeing to an action without him having to mediate. Then the pressures and duties of his role came back to his. "Gentlemen, we have that book to return. I believe while Spock and I are off the ship you will be looking after Hanley."

"Yes, I am not expecting any change in his condition but you better believe I will be looking after Hanley and I will make sure that the Healers can see him."

"So **I do not have to worry** about one of your overly protective irrational outbursts when they are here?"

"Like I said, Jim, as long as Spock is in there with me I will feel better. Your order to him to be in Sickbay with Hanley and assist me with him will ease the tensions that might arise. What happens next?"

"Spock and I are to beam down just before dawn with the book and will be met by Sarek and some of the Elders then there will be some sort of ceremony and we will be back shortly after that with the Elders and some Healers so they can see Officer Hanley. By then we should have our next orders and leave."

"Just before you came Spock and I were saying how we were fairly sure that his mother would invite us for a visit and try to get the crew some shore time if they want it. Having met her I feel sure she will have a talk with her husband and,"

"I am sure if time allows, Bones, and we are invited, I will be only too pleased to accept for us. But I think, for now, we best get ready for tomorrow as I have a feeling it will be interesting. I will see you when we get back, Bones, and see you, Spock at,"

"I suggest oh five hundred hours, Jim. The Elders are to return the book to its rightful place just as the first rays light the sky. I know under most conditions you would not be allowed to enter the room the book is kept in and I am not sure if you will be allowed to enter the room the book is kept in even now, it will depend on the Elders however, Jim, I am certain my father will ask that you be allowed to attend the full ceremony. I will meet you in the Transporter Room then, Jim. I suggest you get a very restful night's sleep as I am certain you will find tomorrow a very taxing day as there will be a lot of ceremonial language that I will have to translate after the ceremony. I will also ensure that I have sufficient water on hand for you as you will require more hydration than Vulcans."

As Kirk settled for the night he thanked whatever gods were watching out for him and his crew as he knew how blessed he was to have Spock and McCoy as his two closest friends and the bridge crew as close friends, and the rest of the crew to support them and be there for them. He thought of how Hanley had looked when he beamed aboard, how he had looked at Spock as he held out the box the book was in, and then how, once he clearly knew Spock was holding the box, he fell like a felled beast before he went into convulsions and vomited a bloody fluid. He knew whatever was to come he could face as long as they were with him. He fully understood why McCoy had wanted to have Spock with him with the Healers there as he did have a rather short temper at times. He was smiling as sleep claimed him as he was thinking of how Spock had so effortlessly got him to agree to him staying with McCoy when the Healers were aboard.

McCoy stood for a moment watching his Vulcan friend just looking down at Officer Hanley and thought again of how he had managed to get Jim to order him to be in Sickbay when the Healers were there. So many times he had jokingly called him a cunning little Vulcan. "You do realize that the Healers may be our only hope to save him, they may know something about toitak that I, that we do not know, some small thing that can help us find a way to bring him back?"

"I am aware that there is a Human need to believe in what is most unlikely to happen, Doctor, but I am also aware that the Healers do possess a great deal of knowledge and some go to great lengths to acquire more knowledge of the history of different medicines, treatments, ailments, and conditions through history in many cultures and different species. There is a possibility, albeit very minuscule, of that being the case but I will concede that there is a possibility. I will be most interested to see which Healers are invited to see him."

McCoy looked at Spock and the Vulcan saw the clear surprise, "You surprised? Any special reason?"

"There is one, a female, who gained admission to Starfleet's advanced medical studies at the time I was appointed to the Enterprise. I have been informed that she is one of the more senior Healers and although she does not leave Vulcan many off-planet medical specialists seek her out. I would be pleased to meet with her."

"What about her husband? He possibly would not like you and her,"

"Her mate took his own life after their only child was killed in an accident that he caused. She was off-planet at the time. Since then she has dedicated herself to study and applying her learning to her patients. She may know of a way to help Hanley but as there has been no paper written on any treatment on toitak for many decades I would not hold out too much hope, Doctor."

Carefully McCoy placed a hand briefly on Spock's arm and when the Vulcan looked at him said, "We will know tomorrow, Spock. You best go get rested up. I will try to be civil tomorrow."

"I would expect nothing less from you, Doctor. I will be with you and him while the Healers are here."

"Thank you for that, Spock, now go get some sleep. I'll be with Hanley."

Once Spock had gone McCoy looked at the patient who had caused all of this and wondered what was keeping him with them. All registers indicated regular heartbeat, regular breathing rates and volume, and there was no change in his brain activity. He did not like to think of how many times he had seen this officer in this intensive care unit over the years, how many times he had saved one of his closest friends but this time it was for something for one of his closest friends and his people. When Spock had shown him the recorded message he had not been surprised at his actions nor that Hanley had made Spock the one responsible for his fate as he had both Spock and Kirk as those responsible for his fate should he be unable to communicate his wants. He stretched out on the emergency cot in his office after turning the monitor so he could easily see it and turned the volume up knowing he would wake should he hear a change in the blips.

Captain James Kirk was still trying to get his fingers to effortlessly part for the Vulcan greeting as he walked to the Transporter Room and was momentarily not surprised when his First Officer arrived not in uniform but in Vulcan clothing and with the box wrapped in a red and gold cloth, then remembered what Spock had said about who and what he was on Vulcan. He saw how Spock nodded after a quick appraisal of how he looked and saw a slight smile, "My father has explained to the Elders and Healers that you will accompany me and that you will be silent and are not be expected to give the formal Vulcan greeting as this is a unique Vulcan ceremony which will be conducted in Vulcan. They agreed and are pleased you will be there for you representing off-worlders as a whole and the means by which the book was returned. I will be representing Officer Hanley as he is unable to be there. One of the Elders will, when they are aboard the ship, give him what Humans call a blessing."

As they stepped onto the pads he looked at Spock, "I admit I was worried about doing the greeting correctly. Did not want to embarrass you or your father. Energize."

* * *

 **A/N** Typical - long weekend coming and had hoped to get the yards/gardens set for winter and rain is forecast. Thanks for reading. Take care and HAVE FUN.


	9. Chapter 9

When they materialized on Vulcan Kirk saw Sarek standing before about twenty others. There was just the slightest of nods from Sarek in recognition and welcome to him before he walked up to Spock with three of the others. Spock knelt on one knee and held up the wrapped box, holding it while the three unwrapped it and then looked at Spock before taking the box and turning to the group and saying something. The others parted and the three walked through them followed by Sarek. Spock took two steps to follow and looked at Kirk with a nod that indicated he should follow, and the others silently followed him.

They had walked into a building and Kirk found he was surprised as he could not mentally place where the building was he realized that even the Enterprise's scanners had not detected it as he had watched the scans done of the area prior to going to the Transporter Room. He remembered how on the screen this area had looked like an open field. In so many areas the Vulcan were clearly more advanced than even Starfleet knew about. He knew that Vulcans like privacy and to be able to somehow hide such a building in plain sight, undetectable by scanners such as were on the Enterprise showed him the lengths they would go to for that privacy. He found himself wondering how anybody but a Vulcan would know it was here as there were no signs to indicate where it was or what it was.

He remembered when he realized he was to get the Enterprise and that the Chief Science Officer was Vulcan that he did some studying into the Vulcan way and had been told that much of this was lost in the wars or that Vulcans did not care for history the way others did. In those weeks before he took command he had studied all he could find and seen all he could that there was about Vulcan history but what he saw in the Hall dedicated to Surak went far beyond that. Here was real Vulcan history. Here were artefacts from when there was so much conflict and wars on Vulcan. All around him were bits from that history. It was obvious that the further into the building they went the more personal the displays were to how great a philosopher, scientist, and logician Surak was.

Four times during the ceremony Spock had moved closer to him and handed him a bottle of water. Although the others were possibly aware of the movement most were in awe and reverence about the book being back and ensuring it had not been damaged. Even though he did not understand much of what was said he could tell that both Spock and his father were being praised for the finding and return of the book. He listened to how easily Spock slipped back into speaking Vulcan and how he only hesitated shortly after saying what sounded like besu after mentioning Colin Hanley and then Kirk recognized the word toitak and a word that sounded like matoi. There was no mistaking the look on the faces of those there as it was clear they had not been told before. Sarek quickly took over the talking as clearly what was being said or asked about Hanley was starting to annoy Spock and Kirk had seen a bit of annoyance on Sarek's face so it had not surprised him how the Elders looked at Sarek after he had said only a few words. Whatever those words were the Elders went quiet and seemed to have a different look about them when they looked at Spock, an understanding and almost, for a Vulcan, sympathetic look. One-by-one the other Elders all lightly touched the book and said a few words giving Spock and his father a nod. When the last one approached the book a strange quiet seemed to fill the room and when the old man looked at him Kirk wondered if he were looking at all of Vulcan in those eyes, eyes that seemed to see into his core. For at least three minutes, while the old man talked and had kept looking at him, Kirk had a sensation of total peacefulness all about him. Even when the old man finally looked away from him and at the book and the others Kirk still was aware of a peace about him he often experienced when with Spock. There was a slow chanting, almost a song, that was started by the senior Elder and finished with a solo verse started by Sarek but finished by Spock and Kirk could tell from the subtle reaction of the others that they had not expected that.

As soon as they stepped outside the hall the senior elder walked up to Kirk with the others behind him and Sarek and Spock beside him. "Captain James Tiberius Kirk, Vulcan thanks you for assisting in the return of that which was stolen from Vulcan. At your convenience we would like to send a representative see one Colin Hanley, an officer on your ship. in order to thank him for what he did in securing the book for Spock, son of Sarek."

"It has been my privilege, Sir. I informed my Chief Medical Officer, Doctor Leonard McCoy, when I accepted the invitation to attend this ceremony that I would most likely be returning with some guests who would want to see Officer Hanley and he said he had no objections. I shall return now to the ship and await your arrival."

"That is most kind, Captain Kirk. Spock, son of Sarek, will return to the ship with you. If we may we would like a select group of our Healers to also see Officer Hanley."

"That matter was also raised with Doctor McCoy and he had no objection to them seeing Officer Hanley as long as my First Officer is present."

"We shall notify them and prepare to board on one standard hour."

Back on the ship Kirk did not have to wait long for Spock to arrive at his quarters back in his uniform and looking like the Spock he was used to seeing. On Vulcan he had seen him fitting into a role he was born into but not of his choosing. Many would not notice the differences unless they knew his different postures and facial features. Everything about him on the planet had been so different from his normal life, it had been clear that he was just going through the motions that he had had been conditioned to follow in those situations.

"Captain, basically the ceremony was about the loss of the book and the return of the book and the new building it and all things to do with Surek are kept. They had had one ceremony for the opening of the new building and this was to celebrate the completion and the return of the book. A recording was made of you being there as the captain of the ship that not only brought the book back but also my commanding officer as well as the commanding officer of the officer who got the book for me. They mentioned that in getting the book the officer was exposed to Toitak and that he was being assisted by both Human and Vulcan healers."

"New, new building?"

"The fact that an off-worlder was able to get to the book as easily as that man did showed the need for a new Hall to store it in. This building is not exactly a new building but it has been renovated to be worthy of holding things that Surek had owned and that are of such significance to Vulcan and as such it had to have a small special ceremony they incorporated with the return of the book."

Not too sure how to raise the topic Kirk just nodded for a moment then looked at Spock, "I heard toitak mentioned and a word like it that made them all look surprised."

"Ahh, the word was ma'toi and was used when it was mentioned that he had to drink a great quantity of toitak as he is in a state very close to death. I did check with McCoy before I came here and there has been no change in Officer Hanley's condition. If you have no questions about the ceremony, Captain, I best go try to get McCoy into a calm state before our guests arrive."

"I will think over the whole ceremony after our guests have been but I agree it best you try to keep McCoy calm when our guests arrive and while they are here." Kirk smiled, "You know, **one day** I may forgive you and McCoy for double-teaming me the way you did about you being in Sickbay while the Healers are here. That making me make it an order was a new thing for you. Caught me right off guard." Kirk stopped there as he knew Spock would only say he was being illogical if he were to say that the two of them were more alike than they were different and that they shared more than either wanted to admit. For years he had known that there was a bond between the two but this just showed how close they were.

"I will be most interested to see how the good doctor reacts when so many Vulcan Healers arrive in his domain."

"Many?" Kirk looked at Spock, "How many do you think they will bring?"

"I believe Humans used to ask how long is a piece of string, Captain, when they wanted an exact number when the number was unknown or uncertain. The words used were 'a select group" which, by Vulcan standards when applied to Healers, is about twenty as that is one specialist from each of the areas of medicine. It will be most enlightening to see what sort of questions they ask McCoy and how he replies. I believe my services will be of need not only to reassure McCoy but also to translate from his rather colourful descriptive terms to the exactness of Vulcan."

Kirk smiled and saw Spock reflect it, "I am sure he will appreciate it, Spock, despite how he might react at the time. I most surprised that you two were so calm about allow them to come aboard, you are usually at loggerheads about it."

"We just calmly discussed how we would deal with the visitors and answer all their questions but remind them that Hanley is not only McCoy's patient but also an officer who answers to me. We both also agreed to what they asked for and that we would make it clear that Officer Hanley would remain on the ship."

"I have my doubts about the calmly discussed part, Spock, but you clearly agreed on what you will do when they are here and you will be able to keep McCoy from starting some major conflict that would end up involving the Command and more than just the Vulcan Ambassador. I'll leave it to the two of you to deal with them after I bring them there. Think there will be any who know anything about Human biology?"

"There is one, a woman, who studied at the facility at Command. She is known to have the best skills with most non-Vulcans of the Healers, but she is also the most reclusive, seeming to prefer study to being actually involved with others. It is said that after her mate caused the death of their only child and then committed suicide while she was off-planet several years ago she finished her studies, returned to Vulcan and has not left Vulcan since although she has been offered many opportunities to work and further her studies off-planet that most Healers, as Humans say, can only dream of. Should she come I would not be surprised if she asks the most questions."

Despite himself Kirk laughed, "Just what Bones would want, a female Vulcan to question his treatment of a Human male. You know, Spock, I do not envy you that role if she does come aboard."

"I do not believe she will come as, having worked and studied at the medical facilities at Command, she will know how Command gets copies of all medical findings on all ships. She is most protective of her work and only releases papers when nothing in them can be refuted or proved to be in error in any way from fact to format."

"You sounded a bit disappointed there, Spock."

"It is only that for a case such as we have with the toitak I would find McCoy's reports more insightful as he would involve how the patient was, he would state the multitude of options that were considered if only for a moment. His reports reflect the concern, compassion, confidence, and dedication of a real Healer in his own unique way and not necessarily in the structured way expected. I believe her reports show a lack of what you would call soul."

Spock walked into Sickbay and saw McCoy had done a noticeable tidy of his office and had put on a new jacket but said nothing. "Ya know, Spock, there is a Vulcan Healer who would have been real interesting to have met before they got so analytical. Don't even ask me to try to pronounce her full name but she is known as Rai. Something must have happened to her about twelve years ago as her papers went from being enlightened and enlivened to being as exciting as reading sheet after sheet of medical readings from banks of computers. Do you know if anything happened to her like some sort of mental illness?"

"I was just speaking with Jim about her. Her husband killed their only child and then committed suicide twelve years ago while she was doing an advanced study at Command. She has become almost a recluse. There are some on Vulcan who still believe that those who survive the severance of a bond either die through loneliness and isolation, go mad, or become recluses. Widows and widowers are not common in Vulcan society – they do exist and are there but are not usually found in the general public. She finished her studies, returned to Vulcan and is often sought out by other Healers for assistance. If memory serves you are correct as to when her papers started to have a different style to their presentation." For a moment Spock was quiet and looked at McCoy and then at Hanley, "I mean no offence, Doctor, but it might be beneficial if you ask for her opinion as to what could be done for Hanley, she may have studied toitak and be able to offer some new insight."

McCoy nodded, knowing Spock's suggestion was not questioning his ability but reminding him that others might have had access to material he had not had access to. "No offence taken, Spock. If the opportunity arises I shall ask her for her opinion, as long as you can translate if she goes all Vulcan on me."

They were standing in silence looking at Hanley when they heard Kirk's voice saying, "And here is our Sickbay. I am pleased to introduce my Chief Medical Officer, Doctor Leonard McCoy and my First Officer, Spock." Both McCoy and Spock turned to see a gaggle of about twenty Vulcans and amongst them a statuesque Vulcan woman. McCoy glanced quickly to look at Spock who gave a slight nod but otherwise seemed unmoved.

One elderly man walked forward from a group of four men, the others respectfully parting so he could easily get to where McCoy and Spock stood by the bed. Spock recognized him as an Elder from Gol, a man revered for his age and his wisdom. Without a word he walked up to the bed and placed his right hand on Hanley's face in a way Spock had only seen once before in his life. It was not a normal meld but a touch used for blessings and peace.

For a moment there was a tranquil stillness in the room and then the man looked at Doctor McCoy, "I thank thee for allowing me to thank him on behalf of all of Vulcan." then he looked at Spock, "Spock, son of Sarek, he gives thee all credit for the safe return of that which was stolen. Vulcan thanks thee and thy line." Finally he looked at Kirk who had stayed at the back of the group. "We will take our leave of you, Captain Kirk. Vulcan thanks thee for transporting the book back to where it belongs. May you and all on your ship live long and prosper."

"Thank you, Sir. Ensign O'Connel will escort you to the Transporter Room."

It was only as the Elders were leaving that the others, the Healers, were able to really see Hanley and Spock noticed how they started to walk forward to get a better view. Two that Spock recognized as specialists with impressive reputations started to reach towards Hanley when they suddenly stopped as though suddenly paralyzed by the power and emotion behind the voice that seemed to fill the room.

" **KROIKAH**! **Thou will not touch** Adaptive Civilian Transactions Officer **Colin Glenn Hanley!** "


	10. Chapter 10

While all around her were still McCoy and Kirk noticed how Spock had raised an eyebrow and really looked at the woman as she walked up to stand by the bed and quickly looked from Hanley to look at the two Healers who had walk up towards the bed, clearly eager to examine Officer Hanley. McCoy realized, having known Spock so well, that it was not just a look when she had looked at the two Healers but a glare that should have instantly turned them into fine ash. "Thy two **shame us as Healers** for thou hast shown not only great arrogance and disrespect by not asking Doctor Leonard McCoy for his permission to near his patient but ye s **hame us as Vulcans** as well for not remembering your place. We are guests and privileged guests at that to be able to just **see** one who has been poisoned by toitak. We have not had this opportunity in one hundred and eighty-seven standard years and ye **thought of yourselves**. Doctor Leonard McCoy did not have to allow us to have the opportunity to even see such a case and yet he invited us to see his patient. I now regret allowing you two to come. Should either attempt to touch his patient I will ask Spock, son of Sarek, to have you removed from the ship. Your actions will be reported and go on **public record**. Go stand at the back of the group and say nothing. You will not approach this patient again even should Doctor McCoy allow any us to approach him after your action of arrogance."

McCoy saw the surprise on Spock's face as the woman turned to look at them, "I ask forgiveness for my action but I could not allow such disrespect to continue. They had not asked for permission to take such an action and showed not only an arrogant presumption on their part based on having read about toitak but also they both are almost irrationally dismissive of work by Human doctors believing only Vulcans are true Healers. They clearly have not studied the great papers written by you, Doctor Leonard McCoy or you, Spock, son of Sarek."

"I am honoured, madam, but you can just call me Doctor McCoy and we call the one you call Spock, son of Sarek, either Mister Spock or Spock. I don't believe he would mind if, while on the ship, you called him that."

Spock briefly looked at McCoy and hoped his friend could see the gratitude on his face as he had been struggling for a way not to insult her while asking her to use the name he was known by on the ship then looked at the woman, "It is a Human custom to not mention lineage with one's name and I, as Doctor McCoy stated, would prefer that I, while on the Enterprise, be addressed as he stated. If I may be so bold, by what name should we address you? I am aware you have many titles gained through your hard work and dedication to medical science." Even as he was talking with the woman Spock was aware she was not looking at him but looking at Hanley in a most unusual and yet oddly familiar manner.

Just for a moment all three Human males saw it, a slight change in the woman's manner as she kept looking at Hanley. "I have found it best just to be referred to a Rai. Years ago I was told it was easy to say by all beings, that it had many different meanings, and that it suited me." All three nearly missed the way the woman closed her eyes and let out a sigh before looking at McCoy, "If I may I would appreciate seeing all your findings on him. I believe there may be some treatment you may not have tried."

"Certainly, if you will come with me to my office you will see all I have on his present condition from when he arrived back on the Enterprise."

She started to follow him then turned and looked at Kirk and Spock, "Captain Kirk, I appreciate you allowing myself and the other Healers to come and see Officer Hanley. I am certain that the others have seen enough to know that he is indeed getting the best possible care for one poisoned by toitak. I will return to Vulcan later but there is nothing that can be gained by them just looking at Officer Hanley as there are visual records of others who were poisoned by toitak. They should leave."

McCoy looked at Spock and took a deep breath before he nodded and turned to face Healer Rai, "Perhaps they should get a closer look at him before they leave. I will give you access to all I have on him since his encounter with toitak and you may share what you want to of it with the others. As you said, it has been one hundred and eighty-seven standard years since this was last seen so I can think of no reason they cannot seen the visible symptoms up close. Mister Spock and I will ensure, if you are agreeable, that those you allow to step forward have five standard minutes each to see his body to his waist, can hear his breathing, can see the reading on the monitors, but not touch him."

Healer Rai looked at Spock, "Ye will ensure that none touch him nor have longer than five standard minutes."

"None shall get close enough to touch him, Healer Rai."

There was a moment's silence as Healer Rai and Spock just looked at one another then Heal Rai nodded, "It has been obvious from where and how ye and Doctor McCoy have stood that we were to just see him but not examine him. We are thankful for this great opportunity. There are two,"

" **They will not be allowed to approach him**. They may watch the others or they may leave. It is your decision, Healer Rai."

Healer Rai turned and there was more than an edge to her voice as she looked at the two who had been banished to the back of the group, "Ye will now return directly to your positions at your facilities. When I return we will discuss your futures. The rest will make full use of their time to study the patient."

"If you will excuse me, Healer Rai, I have matters I must attend to. I will rejoin you shortly."

"That would be most welcome, Captain Kirk, as I may have questions for you."

McCoy tried not to smile when Kirk had looked at him before leaving. He had seen that look of almost comical dread on Kirk's face as he turned away, he could almost hear Kirk saying to himself, "Oh great, another Vulcan with more questions."

One by one the Healers had walk by Hanley, had stopped for five minutes and most had clearly been memorizing the color of his skin, the sound of his breathing, the reading on the displays, the rate of the fluids going into his body intravenously and the color and volume of the liquids draining from his body.

While the Healers had been walking by Hanley Spock had been watching Healer Rai. He was well aware of her achievements as a Healer, being one of the few to become a leading Healer when she did and then to become the third most sought after Healer on all of Vulcan and the most sought after when dealing with other species similar to Vulcans. At first he had thought that she was watching the other Healers to ensure they behaved but the more he watched her the more he was seeing a female Vulcan version of McCoy whenever Jim was in this room. There was some other connection there, a deeper connection _. "Kroikah! Thou will not touch Adaptive Civilian Transactions Officer Colin Glenn Hanley!"_ She had known not only his full name but also his specialized area of expertise, a fact that was not on any report she would have had access to. There was nothing on his record that indicated any interaction with any Vulcans nor time on Vulcan. While they had both been at Command at same time their areas were well apart physically and there would have been little time for socializing as Spock knew only too well how treasured by Vulcans the year's specialized studies at Command are to waste time fraternizing with others and how very physically and mentally testing and draining the triennial testing of A.C.T. officers at Command was. No, Spock slightly shook his head, there was a connection but what could it be? There was no logical way there should be a connection but it was obvious that there was one.

As the last Healer started to leave he turned and looked at Spock, then McCoy, and finally at Healer Rai, "Healer Rai, I wish to thank you for asking me to come, it was an honour. Mister Spock and Doctor McCoy, I also thank you for allowing us to see a patient with such a case of toitak poisoning. It is obvious he will receive the best of care here. Live long and prosper."

"Now, Healer Rai, if you wish to follow me I will show you his record from the time of time he arrived back on the ship till just before you beamed aboard."

"Most kind, thank you, Doctor McCoy."

They started to walk into McCoy's office when Spock knew he had to ask, he had not right to but felt he had to know as the more he thought about it the more he became aware there was no logical answer, "If I may, Healer Rai, I would ask **a** question of you?"

"A question, Mister Spock, regarding the patient?"

"Yes, it is **regarding the patient**."


	11. Chapter 11

McCoy could not explain it but as soon as he entered his office he flicked his intercom and simply said, "Jim, get down here **now** in stealth mode." then heard how Spock had asked Healer Rai if he could ask her a question and knew that he had not read the Vulcan wrong. He had seen how his Vulcan friend had been watching the Vulcan Healer, had seen the way he was more studying her than just watching her. At first he thought it was just because of her being so attractive but then realized it would be something more substantial than just her appearance.

"I do not mean to pry into your personal life, Healer Rai, but I would like to know how you know not only Officer Hanley's specialist rank title but also his full name? As far as I am aware this information is not on information to even those in Star Fleet without proper clearance."

"With all due respect, Mister Spock, how and when I heard of his ranking and his full given name has no bearing on how I will assess the severity of his ailment nor how I will treat him. If memory serves officers with his skills equal to his are extremely rare so it is only logical that a First Officer should be more concerned about finding an officer of equal ranking to replace him than my knowing such details of a crew member."

It was clear to McCoy that Spock had met his match with this woman. He wanted to smile as this woman knowing Officer Hanley's full name and his ranking had clearly aroused Spock's curiosity about her yet anybody who had read any of Healer Rai's papers would know how painfully exacting she was when it came to research and listing her sources so clearly she had heard it or read it somewhere. The thought of Spock being caught so very unprepared about a crew member with Hanley's ranking, was, for as long as McCoy could remember, most unusual, almost a first.

Spock was still clearly trying to think of an appropriate reply when Kirk all but charged into McCoy's office and halted when McCoy held up one hand and put the index finger of his other hand to his lips to let Kirk know to be quiet.

"With all due respect, Healer Rai, until it is confirmed that Officer Hanley will not recover from his current ailment and be unable to resume his specialist duties it is illogical to contact Command requesting for a replacement. I am still waiting to be informed exactly how you knew Officer Hanley's ranking and his full name."

"And I, Mister Spock, still await Doctor McCoy presenting me with Officer Hanley's latest readings and record of his treatment."

With a nod of his head McCoy indicated to Kirk they should go in and save their Vulcan friend as it sounded like Healer Rai was even more stubborn than he could be. "Did I hear my name being mentioned? Here is a record of his treatment since his arrival and his latest readings." Healer Rai nodded her thanks as she took the pad and immediately looked at it, "As you can see we have tried everything and nothing has changed."

"Doctor McCoy, while I see that you have tried almost everything that is known, including hemodialysis and plasmapheresis which have not used in centuries, you have clearly not tried everything as there is no mention of using activated charcoal."

"I had thought of it but it is too barbaric and he had drunk the toitak hours before I had tried the more current treatments. There was no point in subjecting him to possible internal dehydration."

"How long has it been now since he drank the toitak?"

"Approximately one hundred and fifty hours,"

The woman looked almost shocked as she looked at Spock, "Approximately? You do not know exactly how long? Were you not with him? Is he not this way because of you?"

"Healer Rai, Mister Spock was attacked and," Kirk started as he did not like the way the woman was looking at Spock and accusing him.

"I was not asking you, Captain Kirk." The Healer only briefly looked away from Kirk, "It is my understanding that Mister Spock located the book but Officer Hanley was sent to get it."

"There you are mistaken, Healer Rai." There was no mistaking the surprise and annoyance that flashed across her face as Kirk spoke again, "Officer Hanley **was not sent**."

For a moment it seemed she was not aware of them, that she was thinking of another place and time, then looked at Spock, "My apologies, Mister Spock. Might I ask if he left a note of any kind?" The random exactness of the question caught Spock unprepared and the Healer clearly saw his reaction, "A note to you informing you of him taking an action to get the book for you, am I correct?"

"To know that you have heard more of Officer Hanley than what you have said."

"But you still maintain it has been approximately one hundred and fifty hours?"

"Yes."

"Doctor McCoy, I need assistance and approximately five hundred grams of activated charcoal and Officer Hanley moved to a drainage bed. It is an old fashioned method that might clear the Toitak from his body."

"But it is his mind that,"

"I need that activated charcoal **now** , Doctor. As we work I will explain the reasons it may yet work for him."

For a moment McCoy hesitated. As far as he was concerned it was far too late to use what she asked for and it was an old and most barbaric process. Do no harm. He had sworn to do no harm and everything in him rebelled against the idea. Just as he was about to state there was no way he would do it he saw the look on Spock's face. It was the same plea he had often seen whenever Jim's life had been at risk and he had been unsure of a new treatment. This was not a new treatment, this was.

Spock's voice was full of authority and, to those who knew him, just a touch of concern. " **I will get it** for you, Doctor McCoy, while you and the Captain move Hanley to the drainage bed." Almost automatically McCoy moved and saw Kirk already beside the bed and when they looked at each other McCoy saw that Kirk had also heard that unusual concern in their friend's voice. It was a concern they usually only heard when it was the bridge crew involved and they both knew that Spock would somehow be blaming himself.

When Spock returned with the activated charcoal he paused for a moment as he looked at the three standing around the bed, each looking down at Hanley and each look saying so much and so different from the others. While there was clear uncertainty blended with that Human habit of hoping on McCoy's face and on Jim's face he saw a certainty, concern, and compassion. The total Vulcan professionalism that he had seen on so many Healers throughout his life was on Healer Rai's face and yet there was another expression as well, one he found he could not name yet he knew it, had felt it, and understood it.

He also noticed that while Kirk and McCoy were holding onto Hanley Healer Rai was just standing looking down at him. There was now no doubt in his mind that there was far more that Healer Rai was not telling them about her knowledge regarding Hanley.

Almost as soon as she took the small container of charcoal all three officers noticed a change in the woman. All signs of softness and every indication of a possibility of having known about Hanley before were gone as she directed them in what to do. Throughout the next twenty-six point four minutes that they worked on Hanley Spock noticed how Healer Rai had not touched Hanley, which he found most unusual. Every Healer he had encountered had always used a light mind meld with their patients to confirm their initial beliefs as the how the patient was, as the Humans said, feeling. As she had said she would do as they followed her directions Healer Rai explained exactly why their actions might work. Spock could not help but notice how all the while they worked and she explained the reasoning behind the actions not once had she said the patient or Officer Hanley, she had spoken only of the interaction of the substances and the bodily fluids. Healer Rai had been very exact and professional and yet about her eyes Spock had seen a concern that was more a look of concern from a friend than a Healer: it was a look he had seen far too many times of McCoy's face as he worked to save Jim.

As they finished Healer Rai said, "Put him back on the other bed on his left side with his limbs at ninety degrees from his body and then ninety degrees parallel to his body. You need to place a mandible spacer in his mouth and tilt his head so that fluids can drain freely from him. We will know in forty-two standard minutes by scan if there is any positive change."

"If you wish to remain on the ship for those forty-two minutes you may prefer to," Kirk started.

"Thank you, Captain Kirk. I would prefer to remain on the ship and in here."

Spock looked at Kirk and then at McCoy and saw they were looking at each other as well as though they were all thinking the same or along the same line.

"I will have some refreshment brought to you. Is there anything in particular you would like?"

"Just a cup of Vulcan tea, thank you. And I would appreciate it if I could be **left alone** to observe any changes. I will, of course, share what I notice with you, Doctor McCoy."

"Thank you, Spock will get your tea. We will be in my office and will come back in forty-five minutes."

"That should be sufficient time to allow for any change. Should any unforeseen change occur I will immediately contact you in your office, Doctor McCoy."

In his officer McCoy looked at Kirk, "Damned brilliant doctor but too Vulcan. She did not once touch Hanley, and everything was so precise and clinical." He opened a cabinet and got out three glasses and a bottle. "If that works then she and I will have to have some long conversations about how she learned it as I had only read about it in old historical medical journals and seen old projections of it being done, so barbaric. Even if I had thought of it earlier I do not think I would have been able to do it as you saw what it involved, although I feel it should have been more liquefied and not warm at all. It is no wonder she is one of Vulcan's leading healers."

Kirk poured himself a small glass of liquid from the bottle McCoy had placed on the table. "I don't know about you, Bones, but I think both Spock and I are sure she knows of Officer Hanley if she does not actually know him. Just not too sure as to where or how they would have met or what sort of relationship they might have had."

"Know she was on a specialized course at Command about ten years ago and not only topped her group of intake but also set a benchmark for all those who follow. From what I heard she was all work then too. So damned Vulcan, at least Spock will sometimes allow us to see some emotion."

When Spock walked into the Intensive Care Room he paused for a moment as he saw Healer Rai standing by the bed just looking down at Officer Hanley. Over the years when he had had contact with Vulcan Healers and when he had, as an adult, observed Healers at work he could not remember ever seeing such an expression on any of the faces. There was some connection there, some deep connection that made him pause, not wanting to interrupt but knowing he had to.

"Healer Rai," he started but she looked at him.

"May we speak unheard by others?"

In his office McCoy looked at Kirk and saw his Captain and friend was like him, wanting to hear what was said but also knowing that they had no right to hear what was said. With a sigh he reached out and flicked a switch knowing that in the Intensive Care Unit a red light would indicate that there was not an open channel nor a recording of what was happening.

"I see that Doctor McCoy has already arranged that we are not heard and that our conversation will not be recorded."

"That is most kind of him." she took a sip of her tea then slowly stood, tookk another sip, set the cup down on the table, looked at Hanley then at him, "Spock, son of Sarek, earlier you asked me earlier how I knew of his ranking and full name?"

"I asked only as I know of no way you could know them."

"You say you **know of no way** I could know such things and yet **you believe you know of how I know** of them?"

"Yes, but it is only **unsubstantiated speculation**."

For a moment she looked at him as though looking for something deep within him them said, "What do you know of the deaths of he who was my bondsmate and our child at his hand?"

"Only that which is recorded as public record."

"You know of dissisocialinfacide?"

"Yes, it is a rare genetic mental disorder in Vulcan males that leads to the killing of one's children. There is a test that now detects it in Vulcan male children at the age of four years. If memory serves that is a test you were the one to discover such a," Spock stopped as he realized what she was not saying.


	12. Chapter 12

"What I am about to tell you, Spock, son of Sarek, must **not be spoken of to anybody**." from the way she had used what he was called on Vulcan let him know it would be of a very personal nature and something not to be spoken of again."

"Agreed, Healer Rai of Vulcan."

"My parents had not been told of it being in the family line of he who was my bondsmate until after their deaths although his family had knowledge of it. They had known when we were bonded that he **could** be a carrier and they did not tell my parents. He who was my bondsmate did confess to it in a message he left to me and stated that he killed our child as he might have also been a carrier. My, my studies proved that belief to be correct. I know I should have felt something close to madness at their death but I did not. We were only physical during the time he was in pon far and had both realized that we had to marry as not only are both families of higher clans with set expectations and that we shared no common interests. Apart from our bonding and briefly during his pon far we never had any what Humans would call friendly mind melds. I did not know him and did not have time to get to know our child as he was three years old when the opportunity to study at Star Fleet Command became available. I had only had four days at Command when I was informed of their deaths and I requested medical samples of their organs. It was then that I became almost totally obsessed with studying. Do you understand the need I felt to find an answer to why before I was told of the dissisocialinfacide?"

Spock nodded as he knew what it was like to be driven to find an answer to a question. He also knew that it was not yet time to talk. There was a look about Healer Rai that let him know she had more to say so that would answer his question about how she knew so much about Officer Hanley.

"You will also remember how at that time a group of disgruntled cadets who had failed their medicals for deep space flights stormed the research facility and killed several specialists and support staff as well as destroying years of research?"

Again Spock nodded as he had read all the reports about the destruction of so many research projects and what had happened to over two-third of the personnel, how the siege had lasted eleven days.

"I could hear them approaching so grabbed my research and started to run to the nearest exit. As I ran I saw bodies of two females I had worked with and they had been clearly violently violated before they were killed. I had all the information ready to send to Vulcan as well as submit to Command and was only thinking of getting it out. I was getting close to the exit when three of the cadets grabbed me, knocked my research out of my hands and stripped off my clothing. They made lurid jokes about me and then there was a loud noise, the area was filled with a gagging cloud, I was pulled away from the two who had been holding me, and hand was placed over my mouth as a voice said, 'Trust me.' and then I was in a small closet and felt somebody wrapping a laboratory coat around me. I felt a cool cloth wipe my face and a bottle of water was put in my hand. There was still a lot of noise I could not decipher but knew it was some sort of destruction. Then there was that voice again saying, "I have to go get some others. If I can I will get your research bits. You must remain quiet. I will come back." There was so much certainly and calmness about the voice and, when I thought of the emotional sensations I had experienced in that brief contact with him, there was concern for me and a confidence that he would protect me."

"Officer Colin Hanley?"

"At the time I did not know his name but I came to know it and him over the ten days he kept me safe. That first night he had returned with part of my research material, six extra laboratory coats, a pillow and blanket, and some food and water. He let me know of the seven other medical personnel and a Star Fleet officer he had been able to get into storage closets and had set up a bit of an early warning system that should keep us safe. That first night he just sat in silence and as I meditated I felt a welcome familiar calmness come over me that I had been certain I would not experience again when I was first attacked. I was aware of him leaving after eight point six hours and found he had left me a torch and a note stating he would see if he could find the rest of my research, he would try to find some Vulcan food, and to only use the torch when I needed to."

"He kept nine of you safe and alive during the siege? The one the fifteen cadets called a ghost?" Somewhere at the back of his mind Spock remembered Captain Pike being delayed at Command and all he had ever said was that he was involved in an incident at the Medical Facility.

"It was not until afterwards that we found out about them thinking of him as a ghost as they only saw him those first few hours yet knew that there was somebody there that they could not isolate. They would find some of their own disabled yet unable to say what had happened. They were aware that their food supplies were going down but never found who was doing it. He had disabled direct access to the security screens so they could not review what was recorded. Even when the Security Unit reviewed the recordings they had difficulty seeing him, it was as though he blended into the building, as he was, as Humans say, hiding in plain sight."

It had not overly surprised Spock when Healer Rai had, almost like a Human gesture, reached out and lightly brushed Officer Hanley's hair into place, "Almost every day there was a note from him and I would see him once a day, twice I feigned sleep and he just adjusted the blanket on me, left a little fresh water and food, and took away my waste, but the other times we would whisper to one another and he helped me not be so aware that I was in such a confined space as I do suffer from mild claustrophobia although it is an irrational and illogical sensation and state of mind. We had many interesting conversations and I know he saved my life but he made nothing of it so we did not discuss it. I am not certain if it was because we seemed to bond more than I had bonded with he who was my bondsmate but when we were about to part he agreed to a mind touch so that I could thank him. **It was then that I found out his full ranking and his full name.** Twenty-six standard months after the event I received a message from him stating he was pleased that I was doing well as he had read of the award I had received for the research. I had planned to get a message back to him but I was offered so many interesting cases to study that I never did respond. When I heard of there being an officer who had done something for you, for Vulcan, I knew it would be him. I have been studying toitak as it occurred to me that if one were to really want to kill an enemy the best way to do so would be to either use either a substance that has not been available for over a century or a disease that was last seen over a hundred years ago and that are fatal to the enemy."

Again she went quiet and Spock saw her just looking down at Hanley the way he had seen Kirk look down at him when he had been in Hanley's position and saw how he must appear when he would look down at Jim.

"Now that I have answered your question, which was of a personal nature, will you answer two for me: one of which is based on procedure and the other on the note he would have left you?"

"I will do my best to fully answer your questions if you will answer one more of mine about those others he saved."

Healer Rai looked at him in silence for twenty-nine seconds and said, "The only person he had saved whom you might know was a Christopher Robin Pike. He had been sent by Doctor Mark Piper for a thorough fluids examination which is a two day in facility situation. He sustained two wounds that Officer Hanley had taken care of enough to save his life even if they did need proper medical attention afterwards. Now, what was it you wished to know?"

"Your statement clarified what I was about to question. Thank you for that. Now, what it is you wish clarification about?"

"The personal matter is with regard to the note he would have left you. Did he state you were to make any decision as to what was to be done for and to him should he be unable to voice his own decisions about his care?"

The words on the note came back to him, " _Should I manage to do so and have any form of severe reaction that renders me unable to make logical decisions regarding my care, I hereby respectfully ask you to make such decisions for me. Just know that I would prefer death to merely existing."_ Aware that Healer Rai was looking at him Spock just nodded and said, "He asked me to."

"As he left you such control over him he would have known that he would prefer death to a life of being kept alive. My procedural questions, therefore, is what will you do should this procedure not succeed and he remain how he has been, trapped in that place between life and death with no escape?"

"Am I correct in understanding that you asking me if I would assist him to die?"

"That, Mister Spock, is exactly what I am asking. Would you, Spock, son of Sarek, one who has so often been spoken of as a great Vulcan scientist, one who adheres to the Vulcan ways and knows only too well the Vulcan beliefs about life, grant him what his asks for and **assist him to die?"**

* * *

 **A/N Thanks for reading and reviewing. Enjoy.**


	13. Chapter 13

Spock was still stunned by her question as the reality that he had not already asked himself that very question dawned on him. Again he saw that note, saw those words _"make_ _logical decisions regarding my care"_ and realized that he was having a strange degree of difficulty attempting to know what the logical decision would be. He had been raised as a Vulcan with the values and beliefs of Vulcans that he had made his way of life and found ways to incorporate them in his life in Starfleet among Humans. He knew of the sanctity of life and how it was one of the worst things that could be done by a Vulcan was to kill another sentient being or creature, especially for little or no valid reason. The killing another sentient being even to save one's own life was wrong. Killing another sentient being in order to save more than oneself was still wrong yet was accepted.

He looked down at Hanley as Healer Rai's words came back to him, _"He will remain how he has been, trapped in that place between life and death with no escape. No escape."_ **There was an escape.** He could help him escape that place he was trapped in. " _Prefer death to merely existing_. " There was an escape and he could help him escape. **He could**. **No.** He needed to think. He could as it would not be him but Healer Rai who would actually do it. He could just. **NO!** He needed more time. He needed to meditate.

" _A Christopher Robin Pike"_ hearing Healer Rai say that had answered so many questions he had had about why Captain Pike had been delayed at Command and only said that there had been _unplanned circumstances_ at the health facility he had to take care of. At the time he had thought it all that unusual as he knew there was a lot of what Human's called scuttlebutt about an attack and hostages but he accepted what Pike had told him although he had to acknowledge he suspected that there was more. Officer Hanley had saved Pike and eight others, including Healer Rai. If Pike had not been on the Enterprise he was sure he would not have lasted long on the ship, nor would he have had the opportunities that that man had allowed him, the way Pike had been almost as supportive as Jim Kirk.

For a moment he again heard, _"grant him what his asks for and assist him to die."_ then he became acutely aware of how Healer Rai was looking at him, it was as though she not only knew what he was going through but also knew of his thinking.

Slowly he walked to stand before her, "I respectfully ask for patience as I find I would require time to consider the matter, Healer Rai. I will wait until we see if your administrations prove to be beneficial. Should they not I would require time to meditate and make my decision about exactly how to answer your question."

She nodded once, "I would expect nothing less from you." For a moment she almost smiled, "At times like this I find myself at ease, perhaps not unlike you, in how I speak as I became accustomed to speaking Standard as those at Starfleet Command did and find that I can express myself better to Humans in it but, at times, I will use formal Vulcan standard. I find it easier to describe how one feels in Standard and yet formal Vulcan standard is more accurate. You have always been trapped between the two worlds, have you not? The product of the love of a Human woman and a Vulcan man, living proof that two peoples so different can love one another and live in harmony."

Her admission was a surprise, "You do seem at ease in both speech patterns and with the language of both. I cannot recall ever thinking of myself as being trapped between the two worlds. If anything it is both a blessing and a curse for I have been able to largely see and, in many ways, understand the reasoning of both points of view. I realized from an early age that neither side was perfect but that by adopting the best of both I could have a good life doing what I find most fulfilling with people whose company I enjoy in an environment where I am accepted as who and what I am." At her nod he raised an eyebrow, "That time you spent with him in the closet, you spoke in Standard, did you not?"

She gave a quick nod as though it could hide the smile had touched her lips and eyes for a moment, "We quietly talked, sang, joked, quoted poems, and I realize now that it was real friendship he was offering me as well as reassuring me that I was safe. Over the years I have thought of him, have often given thought to contacting him, and would periodically start to find him but then I would find something that drew me away for research. I cannot say how but **I knew** I would see him again." She was quiet and looked at Hanley then back at Spock and calmly said, " **I know it is illogical** and I do not need nor want to hear how wrong it is by Vulcan standards, nor analyse the possibilities nor debate the impossibilities of the existence of the **feelings I am aware I have for him**. Feelings that are stronger than those I had for my bondsmate. I was raised to believe such feelings for another who is not family or bondsmate is both impossible and wrong but,"

"To experience those feelings is neither impossible nor is it wrong, Healer Rai." He had not meant to interrupt her but he felt he understood only too well what she was talking about and wanted her to know she need not explain to him.

Dark eyes studied him for a moment and he saw not the judgement he had so often seen from other Vulcans but an understanding. "I too was raised to believe feelings for another who is not family or bondsmate are both impossible and wrong but I have discovered that they are not and that they, in fact, only heighten the enjoyment of learning and life. They reveal how there are truly no disappointments only opportunities, they ask more questions that can be a challenge to find answers for or that can be accepted as questions with too many possibilities to fully answer."

"And **you believe that those feelings are acceptable** irrespective of what the gender is of the other being, am I correct?" Again her words caused him to hesitate and she nodded, "I have noticed how you look at Captain Kirk and the others. You see them as more than shipmates, you have a deeper connection with them do you not? You also speak to them differently, in shades that define your relationship as well as your feelings. That is possibly due to your Human genes."

 _Your Human genes._ It was not said with contempt but more like envy. So many times over so many years he had heard other Vulcans, from Healers and specialist to his classmates, almost spit out those words. He nodded his head once, "My mother is an exceptional Human being. As far as I can remember she has never said anything against my heritage and has, in fact, encouraged me to learn and accept all I could about both sides equally."

Throughout their conversation Spock had noticed how Healer Rai had often reached out and lightly placed her hand on Hanley's hand or face so like how Jim had reached out to touch him whenever he had been on that bed.

While they had been talking Kirk and McCoy had been having their own conversation as both had been startled by Healer Rai for different and yet similar reasons.

" **Yes** , Spock will sometimes let us see some emotions but remember how long it took him to get to that stage and remember he is around Humans all the time, has a Human mother, so has been surrounded by emotions and seen their importance, their use, far more than Healer Rai." Kirk had looked at his drink for a moment then at McCoy, "I think it is because of how Spock was at the start, when I first met him, that I saw something more in how Healer Rai was looking at Officer Hanley as more than as a patient. There seemed to be **something there, some sort of a connection**."

"No, Jim, I still maintain she is just **too blasted Vulcan** for any sort of connection with him other than something to study because of that blasted toitak. I mean she used activated charcoal on him. You saw how she made him swallow it and how she, good gawd, even made him inhale some of the dry charcoal after adding heaven knows what to it. While she was at the course she would've been concentrating strictly on the course as she did a two-year comprehensive course in one year. Even for a Vulcan, that is a hellluva lot of work." McCoy took a long sip of his drink and looked at his Captain and friend, "Plus I think both you and I know that Vulcans are not exactly the most sociable of beings ever created. So **there is no way** there could be any sort of connection."Kirk swirled the last few millilitres in his glass and looked at McCoy, "Ten years ago wasn't there an explosion of some sort in the Medical Facility at Command for hostages taken for about a week?"

"Yeah, a group of twenty disgruntled cadets who were medically unfit for deep space missions kept the rescue teams at bay for eleven days. They slaughtered two-thirds of the personnel and there was a group of nine that never said who it was but somebody kept them safe and fed." McCoy saw that look on Kirk's face he had seen too many times before; the look that all but screamed that he had the answer. "And don't you be going to think it was Hanley as he was in the other part of the Medical Facility, not the Research Unit, and his records show he was being assessed as to his fitness to return to the ship."

"Can you just check his records, Bones?"

"I already know what he was in there for, what caused it, and how it was dealt with but if it will make you happy and prove they could not have met there," McCoy went to his computer and got Colin Hanley's medical file on display, "See, Jim. He was in another unit and was discharged **after the siege** along with Captain Pike and six other members of the Enterprise crew."

" **Damn!** There just is something about the way she looked at Hanley, when she first saw him. I don't know what it was but I could swear that there was a look of one who knows another on her face."

"I just saw an exceptional analytical doctor looking at new and interesting case. You just do not want to face the fact that that is what she would be seeing."

"Think we should have one more shot before we go back. This is mighty smooth stuff."

"Yes, and it is good at calming as well as I think I will need that extra shot to be able to remain calm with her as if he does not make it I imagine she will want an autopsy and if he does make it she will want to take him off ship to study."

"He gave Spock the right to decide for him, Bones."

"And you can just bet she will be using some Vulcan mumbo-jumbo on Spock to get him to agree with her."

"Do you really think Spock would go along with her mumbo-jumbo or with what he believes Hanley would have wanted?"

"Jim, I only said she would be using some mumbo-jumbo on him. Hell, we both know how stubborn he can be and if he is given something the way Hanley gave him the right to decide for him he would think about what Hanley would want or would have wanted."

"Think we should get back in there and see how it is going? It has been forty-five minutes and you know what Spock is like on times and punctuality."

As Kirk and McCoy walked into the Intensive Care Unit both Healer Rai and Spock turned to look at them. "It is time for you to run your tests, Doctor McCoy. There should be at least a nine to twelve per cent change in all your findings. If there is he is improving and if not then he will remain as he is till he dies."

McCoy gave Kirk a look that anybody could tell meant " _I told you so_ " as he slowly walked up to the bed and looked at the registers and then started taking his scans.

* * *

 **A/N** Busy weekend coming up to finish getting the yards ready for winter and getting the house ready for winter. Will get the last bits of the story up as soon as possible.

Thanks for reading and reviewing. Enjoy.

Take care and **HAVE FUN**.


	14. Chapter 14

As he slowly moved his scanner over Hanley in the recesses of his mind McCoy could hear Spock's voice saying " _beads, rattles and bearskins_ " about his way of medicine, now he would be able to question just how advanced Vulcan was if one of their leading medical researchers used activated char. He stopped as he looked at his scanner, trying to maintain a casual yet professional expression, and looked at Hanley before again scanning him then looking again as the registers. "Well, **I'll be damned**."

He had not been aware of saying it till Healer Rai said, "Doctor McCoy, for what reason should you be condemned to everlasting punishment or another terrible fate in the afterlife so many believe in?"

McCoy looked at her then at Spock before he looked back at her, "For years I have been waiting for a chance to get back at him for referring to how I practice medicine as being very primitive then when I saw you using activated charcoal I thought I had a way. Yet there is no way I can as the results show you clearly knew what to do as there is a fifteen percent increase to the functionality of his heart and lungs, there are only traces of unknown substances in his blood, and his neurological readings have improved by eighteen percent." He shook his head, "There seems to be no ill effects to his digestive tract even though the charcoal is going through very slowly through it."

Again he looked at Spock and saw a smile of satisfaction flash on his lips before the Vulcan nodded, "I believe that Healer Rai used it in a rather dry consistency so that it would pass slower through his system in order to absorb surplus liquids which likely contain some traces of toitak. Had it been used at the recommended consistency his system would already have emptied. Clearly it has done just that. It seems that at some stage Vulcan also practiced medicine with methods as primitive as I have seen you use, Doctor."

"Well, whatever happened it worked."

"There you and I **differ** , Doctor McCoy." Healer Rai looked from Officer Hanley to McCoy, "I do not say a procedure has worked unless the end result is the desired result and while the changes are more than I had calculated possible I will only be satisfied when Officer Hanley has returned to full health."

"You must be aware that it might take him considerable time to return to full health once he regains consciousness."

"I am well aware that should he regain consciousness he will certainly encounter substantial difficulties for some considerable time and **require many hours** of assistance from others to regain his mental and physical abilities."

" **Wait, please wait a moment** as I am confused," Kirk looked from Spock to Healer Rai and then to McCoy, "Doctor McCoy, you said **once he regains consciousness** and Healer Rai said **should he regain consciousness** : does this mean you are certain he will regain consciousness Bones?"

"Dammit, Jim, I am being optimistic and I know it. There are, as Spock would say, possibilities that he will not regain consciousness but I refuse to believe that. I have had this man on the table so many times, I have seen him fight so often," McCoy looked at Hanley as he remembered the many times he had watched over him after he had saved either Jim, Spock, or the damned ship, then looked at Healer Rai, "that I just **have to believe** he will fully recover this time despite how illogical that is."

"I would also like to believe he will fully recover, Captain Kirk, however I was raised in a house, as Mister Spock knows only too well if he has not informed you, where **all that matters in life is the pursuit of science** and throughout Vulcan history our family has been the **chief scholars and leaders in science**. There have only been eleven days in my life when **I was truly free of that yoke scientific excellence**, when I was who I am in front of another for the first time in my life knowing **I would not be judged.** " She turned and looked levelly at Spock, "As you know it is because of my medical training and knowledge that I said should he regain consciousness however I would like to believe he will fully recover and **I intend to stay until he does so or it is certain that he will die, in which case I shall remain with him till that happens**."

While Spock just gave a nod McCoy and Kirk looked at each other and knew that **something** had been said during those minutes that Spock and Healer Rai had been alone with Officer Hanley, something to do with the obvious way Healer Rai knew Hanley. Something they may never know about but both knew they would accept that they both had things that others, even each other, knew nothing about.

"Should Officer Hanley not have regained consciousness before we must leave Vulcan I will have quarters made ready for you and inform,"

"That is a most kind offer however there is no need to go to any trouble, Captain Kirk. Before coming aboard I informed those I work with that **I may be absent** for some **considerable time** and have been told by the Vulcan Ambassador that he will ensure my safe return should I leave with the Enterprise."

"Do you not require to fetch from your home what you might need?" It had not surprised Spock that she was that organized but was sure she would still require things from her home if she were to remain on the ship.

"Years ago a friend showed me how easy it is to almost always be prepared for being away from home. I have in my small bag not only what I need to be of assistance to patients but also my personal needs should I need to spent time away from home."

"I will still make accommodation available should you later wish to have time alone." Kirk looked at her, Vulcan or not if she had any sort of relationship with Hanley and he died she would need some time alone. For too many years he had seen how Spock would often seek solace in his quarters.

"That is most kind, Captain, but I shall remain with Officer Hanley to study if there is any further progress or if perhaps a second treatment,"

" **I will not allow tha**t, Healer Rai." McCoy looked from her to Kirk and then at Spock, " **And you should not allow it either**. It may be the Vulcan way but,"

"Doctor, I believe you will find it was also used on **my mother's planet** in the nineteenth and twentieth century. And while I am not in favour of Officer Hanley undergoing the treatment again I, for one, cannot dispute that the first treatment did not, in fact, show that it proved beneficious. There is a possibility of,"

" _My mother's planet_." Earth. Spock had him there and McCoy held up his hand, "Spare us the ratios and percentages, Spock. I accept that it did cause an improvement but at what cost. Did you look at the pain register by any chance and see how high it was?"

"I cannot say what Mister Spock might have noticed, Doctor McCoy, but I was aware of the initial spike in pain, as was to be expected, but that it rapidly returned to as it had been for some time and then gradually dropped by one point six five points. I was also," Hanley's body momentarily arched and there was suddenly an almost overpowering stench, "I will have to analyse the contents of that evacuation. It will indicate what it removed. If you will excuse me."

McCoy looked at Healer Rai, "That was a good indication, his prior awareness if a normally controlled bodily function about to occur. That has not happened before. You have full access to all his records and you may use not only my lab but," he glanced at Spock who nodded then looked back at Healer Rai, "also any of the Enterprise's science laboratories you may wish to use as well as the staff, you will find them eager to learn and very good at following instructions even for those tasks such as getting faecal matter for analysis."

"That will be most helpful, Doctor McCoy. I should go and,"

McCoy walked to the door to the main Sickbay area, "Officers O'Connel and Callon, come in and get some samples for Healer Rai."

"We are honoured to help you, Healer Rai. I am Lieutenant junior grade Medical Science Officer Darren O'Connel and this is Lieutenant junior grade Medical Officer Kelly Callon. Do you require samples from the commencement of the passing as well as midsection and end as Doctor McCoy usually has?"

"Thank you, those three samples would be enough."

" **Would**?" Officer Callon spoke as she looked from Spock to Healer Rai, "I apologize but I guess I have worked with Mister Spock so often that I find I now often question when a person uses either the word would or could as they are **not exact** and **indicate unmentioned possibilities**."

"Oh, good gawd." McCoy shook his head and laughed as he looked at his Vulcan friend, "I've lost another good medic to the logical one."

"Doctor McCoy," Healer Rai looked at him, "I find it refreshing that one with a scientific mind, irrespective of which field of science they are interested in, is willing to engage in other fields of science. I also agree that often there can be, as your expression leads me to believe you believe, too much emphasis on being tediously exact. I think you and I have encountered too many occasions when time is more important to sustaining life than being linguistically correct."

"I apologize, Healer Rai," Officer O'Connel started again, "for getting back to gathering the samples but I know time is the priority and just thought that if it helps with your analysis I will also retrieve a small sample from his rectum for a sample that has not had time to react with the atmosphere outside the body."

The three Star Fleet officers quickly looked at one another as they saw the flicker of a pleasant surprise on Healer Rai's face as she looked at Officer O'Connel, "That would be greatly appreciated as you clearly realize that some substances undergo changes when exposed to the atmosphere after having been in the digestive system. Thank you." She started to turn then looked at the three men, "If you will excuse me, gentlemen, I do have work to attend to. Please inform me immediately of any changes to his condition."

Once Healer Rai and the two officers had left with their samples, McCoy looked at Kirk and Spock when O'Connel came back in and took great care gathering the extra sample then carefully cleaned Hanley, gently lifting him off the messy sheet and placing a clean one under him, all the time talking softly saying, "I won't be long, Colin. Just relax. That's it. Okay, you rest now. I'll take this to Healer Rai and then come back in and be with you as the Captain, Doctor McCoy, and Mister Spock will most likely want to wait for the results in Doctor McCoy's office."

McCoy nodded his thanks and silently escorted Kirk and Spock to his office and sat down as did his two friends. For a moment he was quiet then looked first at Kirk then at Spock, "Now that is one officer you are not getting, Spock. I'd like to see him go and get qualified but he has said he wants more exposure before he knows if it is what he wants to do with his life. He's been with my Division now for two years and show great promise, especially with how he cares about the patients. Officer Callon is far more clinical and would be best in a research role."

"I totally agree, Doctor. I have observed how Officer O'Connel has shown more interest in the physical application of medical science while Officer Callon has clearly a greater interest in quantifiable sciences."

Kirk could not resist smiling, "Am I to believe that you two actually agree on something?"

"I fail to see how you can find that so amusing or surprising, Captain. The good doctor and I do, on occasion, agree on undeniable facts."

"It is just that it is not that often that you actually will openly admit it, Spock. Usually I have to,"

"Doctor McCoy, excuse me," Officer O'Connel rushed into the room, "could you, Mister Spock, and the Captain go in as Healer Rai wants you to see in her words, what has been happening to the toitak in the patient?"

The three men looked at one another before they headed for the room knowing Officer O'Connel would care for Hanley, they had heard the professional in the words, the way she must have said "the patient". It was something that McCoy also did to add some distance between himself and a patient. There must have been a substantial change or something they had not suspected.


	15. Chapter 15

When they walked into the room Healer Rai stood and indicated the four samples with their analysis and pointed to the one closest to her, "If you will start at this one and walk along and look at the both the sample and the analysis you will see just how the activated charcoal scoured, absorbed, and removed so many toxins from his body. You will notice how the final sample has only minimal contaminants, **none** of which are related to toitak."

She remained quiet while the three walked along looking at the samples and reading the findings, occasionally exchanging looks of surprise or confusion. There was no denying that there was a substantial change. Kirk watched the way Spock and McCoy would look at one another as he could see there were different readings and, while he did not fully understand what he was seeing, he could tell from how Spock and McCoy were reacting that it was not only significant but also positive, possibly hopeful.

"Well?" Kirk could not help but ask when both McCoy and Spock had finished looking at the samples and reading the analysis and had looked at each other in silent agreement.

"I, too, would be most interested to hear what your opinions are and to hear your prognosis based on those results, as well as what you believe the patient's possibilities are to a full recovery and return to **full** active duty aboard this ship. It will be most enlightening to hear the medical and the scientific aspects as seen by the two of you," she looked at McCoy and Spock and then looked at Kirk, "I expect that you, Captain Kirk, would have noticed some changes but would not fully understand what those changes indicate."

"I cannot speak for what Mister Spock would have seen, nor what his thoughts might be. I see that there is a distinct difference between the start of the samples and the final sample. It is clear that the activated charcoal was most effective at drawing the toxins from his systems, toxins related with the toitak as well as the others that were most likely in the drinks he drank to get that book."

" **Others?** **What others?**" Spock's voice had that accusatory tone often only McCoy heard and when McCoy looked at him there was no way he could miss seeing how the statement had been a surprise to his Vulcan friend.

"I had not done as detailed analysis of his systems at Healer Rai has, Spock. I was only aware of the toitak and danger to Hanley that it posed, especially when I got the information from Vulcan about it. I did not look beyond that as I had not seen anything in his systems that indicated to such reactions. **I did not think** that there would have been anything else in the drink." As Spock looked at McCoy he saw the self-loathing the man was feeling, the self-blame; and when his friend looked at him Spock say the pain and sorrow about the blue eyes, " **I am so sorry, Spock** , I just did not think there would have been anything else in the drink but that toitak."

"I apologize for being so abrupt, Doctor. I, also, had not thought of anything else being in the drinks that Officer Hanley was given to drink. I was not exactly certain that what I had smelled on his breath was, in fact, toitak, but it would have been the local choice of one with the dislike of Vulcans that that man had. It was illogical to add anything else to,"

"Spock," Healer Rai spoke, "I also would consider anybody with a hatred of Vulcans adding anything but toitak to a drink as illogical. I had not thought that of the fact that we were dealing with Humans and if he wanted to slowly kill Officer Hanley, a man he must have believed was at least sympathetic towards Vulcans as indicated by his willingness to attempt to out-drink him for the book, it is logical for him to have put other liquids in the drink to ensure that occurred. We are most fortunate that Officer Hanley has such a strong internal constitution as well as his regurgitation of so much upon arrival at the ship. We must now find out how those added substances have affected his mental abilities when he regains consciousness."

"He should regain consciousness as his scans show activity," Kirk and Spock saw the surprise on McCoy's face as he looked at Healer Rai and knew he was thinking as they were from how she had said mental abilities.

"Yes, they show activity but intermittently and from various parts of his brain. It is a most unusual occurrence as it is not a clear indication as to what parts of his brain is fully functional and which parts may have been damaged by the substances he drank. It," the three officers looked at one another when she paused and briefly closed her eyes before opening then and looking at Spock, "it would be best to see if he does regain consciousness before we speculate as to at what level he will be aware of his surroundings."

 ** _Aware of his surroundings_**. Spock quickly glanced at Kirk and McCoy and could tell that they did not fully understand what that meant. Having known them for as long as he had he knew they would think she meant Hanley would not know where he was and not that he may not be able to access his senses, that his might be blind, deaf, have no sense of smell, and have trouble with nerve endings and not be able to feel. As he looked at Healer Rai he was sure he saw something, something he knew he would be feeling and thinking if Jim had been in Hanley's place and for a moment he wondered how it was possible as she only knew him for a short time.

"I will be with you when he regains consciousness, Healer Rai, so we can assess his condition as I may be aware of something very Human that you,"

"I beg pardon, Doctor McCoy, but **I will be alone with him** when he regains," Healer Rai started.

" **I** will be with you, Healer Rai. I will be there representing Star Fleet. You will find it in the," Spock started.

"There is no need," the look Healer Rai gave him convinced Spock his thoughts were correct.

"I beg pardon, Healer Rai, as the First Officer of this ship I must inform you that as Officer Hanley is an officer of this ship and you are not a Star Fleet appointed doctor it is required that either Captain Kirk, or Doctor McCoy, or myself be present." As Healer Rai looked at him Spock saw no accusation as he had expected but an acceptance. What he said was fact, it was one of many rules and regulations that Star Fleet had, for any number of reasons, not altered since the conception of Star Fleet. "As I believe I have had more experience than you at being present with Human patients expected to regain consciousness I have been well-schooled under Doctor McCoy's silent tutelage to know what signs to look for that are not seen in Vulcans nor any of the eleven lifeforms I have watched with Doctor McCoy: signs you may now be familiar with."

"You would also be able to corroborate my findings regarding toitak in a Human regaining consciousness. Perhaps I was hasty in assuming I should be alone with him to fully observe how he regains consciousness and his state of mind immediately upon regaining full consciousness. I welcome your presence and observations. If you gentlemen will excuse us." She nodded at Kirk and McCoy and walked into the other room with Spock following her.

Once they had left the room McCoy looked at Kirk, "Jim, I do not know about you but I have a feeling that **Spock suspects something** more than we do. I think whatever they talked about before has to do with Healer Rai and Hanley. Now I do not know how they would have met but I just have a feeling she knows more about him than she is saying."

"I have the same feeling, Bones. There is something there but what did Spock hear that we did not, and why did he insist like that, quoting an obscure regulation, to be in there when Hanley?"

"No doubt he will tell us in his own time."

In the Intensive Care Unit Spock had watched Healer Rai as she stood by the bed just looking down at Officer Hanley in silence for three point seven one minutes before he spoke. He had waited that long as he had watched how she stood looking down at Hanley and mentally saw how he must have appeared to others so many, too many, times when he had looked down at Jim on that bed. Yet there was a subtle difference. A difference he has suspected but now realized that he had not thought about Jim's prognosis the way that she had clearly been thinking about Hanley's.

"Forgive me if I speak out of turn, Healer Rai, but you are not considering **easing his death** should he not fully regain consciousness or, if upon regaining consciousness he is in a state of consciousness you know he would greatly dislike living in, that state of being trapped between full awareness and total confusion, are you?"

Confirmation of what he had thought was in the slightest of movements about her eyes as she turned and looked at him in slight bewilderment, "Do you ask that because it would be what you would do if Captain James Kirk were in his place and regained consciousness in that state? I have seen how you look at him; I had heard tales of your relationship. **Can you honestly say** , if our positions were reversed and that it was Captain Kirk and not Officer Hanley on that bed in that condition, that **you would not be considering the same?"**

* * *

 **A/N** A rocking morning with a 5.2 earthquake this morning. Still waiting for winter weather to at least give an indication of coming as we are having spring-like weather: we've just had a day of torrential rain which the gardens needed as did the rainwater tanks..

Thanks for reading. Take care and HAVE FUN.


	16. Chapter 16

"I," Spock started and then stopped. In her eyes he could tell she already knew the answer but wanted him to give voice to it. While he had, on very rare occasions, admitted it to himself he had never said it aloud, never given it voice. Some part of him, he was not sure if it were part of his Human half or of his Vulcan half, believed to give it voice would make him face the truth about his deepest feelings towards James Kirk. The very thought of Jim living in a state of being trapped between full awareness and total confusion was something he had not allowed himself to dwell on. There were places that took care of patients who lived for years in that state and he would not allow Jim to. **Kroykah!**

He stopped as he not only did not want to think about that but also he was aware of how Healer Rai was studying him, saw how she held her hands, and saw the understanding on her face. Her reputation as one of Vulcan's leading healers was not based just on her applied skills but also her mental or, as the Humans called it, psychic abilities. She knew his truth and wanted him to admit it. He realized that once he had admitted that he would consider for Jim what she was considering for Officer Hanley he would be saying he agreed with her actions, whatever they may be.

"I am sure, Healer Rai, that you are aware it is illogical to make decisions before **all the facts** are known and there is **some form of proof** to substantiate the reasons for forming those decisions. Should you not wait until you have evaluated all the possibilities of Officer Hanley returning to the way of life he has had? Should you not wait until you have fully evaluated what he is capable of?"

"Spock, son of Surak, again I put it to you that if, indeed, it were James Kirk and not Colin Hanley you would be at least considering the possibilities as I am, would you not?"

"There is one major factor that makes a substantial difference to our decisions, Healer Rai, which must be addressed. It must be remembered that I have had **years** in which to study James Kirk under various situations while you had only eleven **days** of being able to study Colin Hanley and in a very testing environment. James Kirk and I have shared many hours in conversation on a multitude of subjects, we are t'hy'la . You would not have had the time to,"

"To what, Spock? " For so many years he had heard tales of how exacting Healer Rai could be, how demanding she was, even his father and T'Pau had called her a very fair but extremely formidable examiner and, as he looked at her, Spock knew those tales he had heard of her being able to have other healers, even more senior healers, exactingly re-examine and re-evaluate their findings and opinions before approaching her for a second opinion on a matter. "You forget that I had one thousand and seventy-eight **hours** in that small closet with him as he would be away for ten hours a day checking on the others and finding us food and water. Do you know what one can learn about another in those conditions over that time? I stated that I saw him only once a day, I did not specify that he would stay with me for fourteen hours at a time. About the only thing we did not discuss was how we met, those first few minutes when he held me as I cried like a child before they learn control, the way he just held me and let me hold onto him. All I got from him was a feeling of unconditional love as he just let me cling to him. I was aware that he would have seen and even felt the cauldron of emotions I experienced as I clung to him and vented all that was in me and yet he never mentioned it. We never discussed our first thoughts about one another. We talked about so many other things; we share some similar interests and have some that are so very different we had very interesting discussion. We saw the strength and weakness in one another. We laughed and cried together with and for each other."

There was a pause as she looked at Officer Hanley, took a cloth and wiped his face, looked at the monitors and readings, then back at him and Spock saw the not only that searching look on her face but also how she was not ashamed to mention emotions. "In that storage closet I realized the truth in words my mother told me that I had so often doubted. She would say that you can know a person for a lifetime and not really know the real them and you can know a person for a few testing hours and you will know them. I had known my bondsmate all my life and yet I did not know the real him, I had known many of those killed that day for at least a decade and yet I did not know them, and I got to know Colin Hanley for one thousand and seventy-eight hours and I got to really know the real him. In that closet there was no space for the façade of polite civilization, for the control of emotions, for anything but being who we really are at our base level. "

"I mean no offence, Healer Rai, but is it not illogical to believe that the events that transpired in those one thousand and seventy-eight hours can be compared with what I have with James Kirk? That is hardly sufficient time to consider all the variables and the possibilities of a chance meeting meaning anything more than survival. You must realize I have known James Kirk for much longer than,"

"Your scientific skills and knowledge are spoken of on Vulcan so you can tell me, as you have known James Kirk approximately one hundred and sixteen times longer than I have known Colin Hanley, exactly how long I would be required to have knowledge of him to equal what you share with James Kirk. How long do you calculate I would have to know Officer Colin Hanley before I could think of him as you think of James Kirk? Do you not believe that there can be a connection, a friendship, between two beings even after knowing one another for only one thousand and seventy-eight hours that time and distance cannot destroy? And, once you have answered that question please answer the question you have tried to avoid giving me an answer for."

It took Spock two point seven one minutes to think about all Healer Rai had said, all that she had revealed. While he would not think any real relationship could be formed in just eleven standard days there were unusual circumstances involved in how she had met Officer Rai. In those one thousand and seventy-eight hours in a small closet knowing what was going on around them, having experienced what she had at the hands of the attackers, having seen what they were doing, and clearly feeling safe with him perhaps it was possible that some form of friendship was made. As far as he was aware it was most unusual for a friendship to exist for so long without any contact and without the mental bond known by Vulcans. It was, perhaps, even more unusual for a friendship like he had with Jim Kirk to exist. He did not even know exactly when he had first thought of James T. Kirk as a friend, when he thought of him as more than just his Captain.

"I ask for pardon, Healer Rai, for it seems I am in error to question your relationship with Officer Hanley for I now understand you do, in fact, have a friendship with him and it was not, and is not, my place nor my right to question that. I have found that it is impossible to put an exact duration of time on the formation of a relationship such as I have with James Kirk, knowing what I know about him and what I have shared with him. There are too many variances and unknown factors to be able to state how long it would take another, be they Human or Vulcan, to think of another with way I think of James Kirk."

Spock paused, suddenly realizing how at ease he felt answering her questions, how strange it was to be talking about his relationship with James Kirk to a person he did not know when he was hesitant to talk about it with even McCoy. He stopped and looked at Officer Hanley, noticing, as he was sure Healer Rai had: that there were positive signs of improvement registering. When he looked up at Healer Rai he saw how she was looking at Colin Hanley and he knew he was seeing a reflection of how he would appear if it were Jim Kirk on that bed and he were Healer Rai. If Jim were going to spend the rest of his life trapped in that state of being trapped between full awareness and total confusion, between life and death then he knew he would take the necessary action to ease his death. **No.** **Yes** **.** The realization of what he was thinking, what he had just admitted to himself, made him gasp, close his eyes, and take a step back from the bed. It was for no more than three seconds but when he looked again at Healer Rai it was in sudden full understanding.

"Healer Rai, I regret it has taken me this long to answer your original question but it is not something I care to contemplate. Many times I have seen James Kirk on this bed; I have experienced great concern about his recovery both as my commanding officer and as what he means to me as a friend. When we are in situations where there is risk to the ship I have to think of him as my commanding officer and under Doctor McCoy's care so I am able to make logical decisions. In those times when there is no outside danger involved, and Jim is in that state of being trapped between full awareness and total confusion I am aware that I have had thoughts of helping ease his death should Doctor McCoy inform me that he would be forever trapped in that state. It is something I prefer not to dwell upon."

"While that still does not answer my question I know you will have to now give it some thought as I can tell you have been made to face the reality that one day it might happen." Healer Rai looked briefly at Hanley then at Spock and he felt as though she knew what he had stopped himself for confessing to himself. "Is not the truth that you will not answer it aloud for to do so you must honestly face the truth of the depth of feelings you have towards and for James Kirk and that you must know, accept, and acknowledge what you would do as a result of those feelings, these emotions, we Vulcans pride ourselves on controlling? I have warred within myself about what will be done for him should he be trapped for the rest of his life in that place between life and death, awareness and confusion but am now at peace with my decision. I believe you will find that peace when you decide on what action you would take for James Kirk."

Again Spock saw how Healer Rai looked at Colin Hanley and watched as she again wiped his face with a cloth and used her fingers to comb his hair into place. Her fingers did not linger on his forehead the way he had sometimes allowed his own fingers to do when he would be with Jim. She was just combing his hair into place and not assisting him as he tried to do for Jim. She stood for a moment by the bed and slowly backed away, "He is showing signs of regaining consciousness. I will stand aside and you will not tell him of my being present. He got the book for you and you are his fellow officer as well as a representative, at least aboard this ship, of all that is Vulcan and that s how you must relate to him. I will know if and when I should make my presence known to him."

One point three eight minutes passed before Officer Hanley gave a slight moan and opened his eyes. For a moment there was no recognition and then he smiled, "Mister Spock. Am I in trouble? Feel like I've got the remnants of one helluva hangover. I imagine the Captain's gonna be mad but I couldn't wait for clearance to go back down."

"He will want to see you once you have significantly recovered. How are you feeling now?"

"Was having a great dream. So real I could swear she was here with me. Like I could hear her."

"Her? A member of the crew or some woman you met recently off ship?"

"Greatest woman alive. I'd have another hangover like that every day if I would see or hear her again. You'd not approve as Rai is a Vulcan doctor."

"I know of her, she is a most intelligent and a highly respected doctor."

"Beautiful, intelligent, full of life, and a dry sense of humor. Our time together was some of the best times in my life. Often think of her and hope she is doing well."

A slight movement caught Spock's eye and he saw Healer Rai standing with her hand on her mouth, her eyes shut, and her head slightly shaking. As he looked at her he realized he saw not one of Vulcan's most revered healers but a woman with deep feelings toward this man. He looked back at Hanley as he thought of what she might want to know but not know how to ask. "I have no right to ask but did you not ever think of proposing marriage to her?"

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A/N Thanks for reading.

Tonight is a Snoopy night as in how he stated several times to type his story starting "It was a dark and stormy night. . ." Am sure the stack of stories I am retyping have reproduced while in that box for the last few years. Will try to be back in about five days - got a busy/frantic week coming up.

Take care and **HAVE FUN**!


	17. Chapter 17

"I thought about it, Sir, but you possibly know her bondsmate died."

"Yes, it is known that he committed suicide."

"As you know Humans do not live as long as Vulcans and I would not want my death to cause her further pain. There is also the fact that it would make her role in Vulcan society awkward: a high ranking healer should not have a Human husband.l and worthy of her. I, I just could not do that to her."

Spock looked at him for a moment as he remembered how having a Human wife had caused some problems for his own father. For Hanley to think of what his actions would do to Healer Rai's reputations showed the true nature of the man. It was clear, from how Hanley now lay on the bed, that he was still very tired.

"May I make two requests, Sir?"

"You may."

"When you go to Vulcan to return the book do not tell them my name as you are returning it, not me. Say you, the Captain, and the ship but not my name. And, if it is not too much trouble, could you see her and say that a friend said to say ATBALL ?"

"ATBALL?" Again Spock caught a movement as Healer Rai almost walked forward but stopped herself. Clearly it had a special meaning.

"If she has remembered me she will know what it means."

"I will tell her. You rest. I will see Doctor McCoy and discuss your treatment. You say you have the remains of a massive headache"

"Thank you, Sir. Sorry, Sir. So tired. Whatever that stuff was it sure had a kick unlike I have had before. Thanks, I will sleep it off."

Once Spock was satisfied Hanley was sleeping Spock turned and looked at Healer Rai who was looking at Hanley in a way he had so often seen his own mother look at his father. It almost seemed wrong to be there and seeing it but when she realized she, as his mother so often had, quickly replaced it with her usual expression.

"While you had not right to ask that of him I do thank you for it will make the path back easier for us, for him."

It had be a quickly corrected statement but Spock knew she meant for former more than the later. "Then you now are expecting a full recovery from him?"

Again Healer Rai reached out and rearranged Hanley's hair, "He is not aware of the length of time that has passed, but that is common among most other non-Vulcans. He remembers events of the past, your name, the Captain's name, and that he drank something that gave him a hangover so that is a good sign. We will know more once he has slept all his body demands he sleep and is able to do more mental and some physical testing. It would perhaps be wise to inform Captain Kirk and Doctor McCoy of his present status and to make provisional plans for the new future."

Spock nodded and went into McCoy's office and clicked on the intercom to the Bridge. Over the years he had studied how it was the most likely place for them to be waiting when they were likely to have dealings with beings from off-ship and who would not understand the way some alcoholic drinks seemed to ease their internal tension. Had they not had Healer Rai aboard he would have contacted Jim's quarters first.

"Bridge here, Spock, what is happening?"

"Could you and Doctor McCoy meet us in McCoy's office? Officer Hanley is sleeping, he believes it is a hangover."

"We'll be right there, Kirk out."

As Kirk and McCoy were leaving the bridge they heard Scotty saying, "Now that, lads, will be the grand-daddy of all hangovers." And, in an exchanged glance, they knew that they had both heard, in the tone of his voice, that their Chief Engineer, who was well-known to have survived several substantial hangovers, was as relieved as they were.

In McCoy's office Healer Rai stood as Kirk and McCoy walked in, followed almost immediately by an ensign bringing two cups of Vulcan tea and two cups of coffee before quickly land quietly leaving. Spock raised an eyebrow as he looked at Kirk, "Lieutenant Uhura no doubt."

Kirk nodded as that was his suspicion as well, "No doubt."

"Please thank Lieutenant Uhura for me. It is a kind gesture as we have much to discuss." Healer Rai seemed to enjoy the sips of tea as she looked the three men. "Gentlemen, I do not know of what Adaptive Civilian Transactions Officer Colin Glenn Hanley specific orders are on this ship but I know the types of situations such officers often encounter. Should Officer Hanley make the full recovery that I presently see no reason why he should not achieve I can find no logical reason why he should not remain on this ship. When he awakens I would like to examine him in my rooms on Vulcan to do an assessment there as well as one aboard the Enterprise.

"I am aware that some of the Elders, on behalf of Vulcan, would like to formally thank you, Captain Kirk, and Mister Spock, for locating and returning the book to Vulcan. As Mister Spock can attest Officer Hanley does not want his name to be associated with the return of the book, just your two names and the ship's." Kirk looked briefly at Spock who gave a slight nod.

"I will get clearance for the crew to have some shore time as I am sure most of them would like some time off the ship." Kirk looked at Healer Rai, "How long would you require to test him? We are to expect new orders in four days."

"My parents will want to extend hospitality to the bridge crew as is their custom whenever the Enterprise comes to Vulcan. My father already made it clear to me in an earlier conversation that Officers Uhura, Chekov, Sulu, Scott, along with Doctor McCoy and Captain Kirk are always welcome to stay and enjoy meals at the house. I am sure they would welcome you and Officer Hanley as well, Healer Rai."

Healer Rai finished her tea and set the cup down as she looked at Spock, "If time and his physical condition allows we shall attend, thank you for the offer. I have heard much about the work of your parents on behalf of Vulcan as well as for Vulcan such as all the assistance your mother gives to the many schools."

Spock knew that her comment about his mother was referring to what Hanley had said about a prominent Vulcan having a Human spouse. He was only too aware of how it was for his mother to always be known as that Human wife and how difficult it had often been for both her and his father. It would be a good thing for Hanley to see his parents, to see how they have had so many years together and were clearly deeply in love with one another.

"Should his physical condition not allow him to attend I am sure my parents would like to meet him and thank him for his actions."

Kirk and McCoy exchanged a look, both knowing the conversation was to do with whatever had taken place when Hanley awoke, with something they might never know about but accepted.

"If you gentlemen will excuse me I will make contact with the staff I will need at the Vulcan medical center to arrange to have him assessed there. I will, with your permission, Captain Kirk, also take **two** of your Security Officers as a mark of my intention that he be returned to the ship after being assessed so that those who might like to study him understand d that he will be **returned** to the ship."

"And, with your permission Captain, I shall contact my parents to arrange for a visit with them and confirm that the crew be granted time on Vulcan should they wish to go off ship for a few hours."

"I shall arrange for two Security Officers to be ready for you, Healer Rai, and Mister Spock, you have my permission to make those arrangements." Kirk nodded and Spock waited a few minutes after Healer Rai had left as he had seen a look on his friend's face that let him know they had to talk.

"How is Officer Hanley, Spock?"

"He appears to be cognitively present and he asked logical questions and understood the answers. I did not have time to give him a physical test, Doctor, but apart from believing that he has only had a major hangover, he seems to be mentally the same Colin Hanley we remember him to be. He even recalled specific events and personnel from over five years ago." Although the could see unasked questions about the blue eyes looking at him Spock also gave a slight nod and knew that McCoy accepted his diagnosis.

"Then it sounds like a few days of physical exercises, once he is fully awake and up to it, will see him back to full duties, albeit that he will be eased back into them over roughly seven to eight days." McCoy rocked slightly on his heels, and smiled, "Should have known that he would not let this keep him down. The number of times he has been in here having his stomach pumped after being on some mission I should have known he would not let a drink knock him."

"No disrespect intended, Doctor McCoy, but I believe you would find that Toitak would do more than just what you call **knock** almost any other drinker who drank it in the amount and potency of what he had. I have sent to your computer all the findings I made from the samples I took as well as from my way of treating him. When he awakens again I will have him taken to the assessment rooms I use. After I have assessed him there he will return to the ship and I will return to discuss my findings and final assessment with you. While I am there I must see the senior Healers about a matter I need to discuss with the two of them before I return. If you will excuse me."

"That's will be good as you will have equipment you are used to using that is most likely very different from what we use and you may find a few things we have missed. I look forward to reading your reports and talking over how you conduct your assessments." McCoy nodded and looked at Kirk and Spock as she left. When she had left McCoy just looked at Spock, "Well, any ideas why she would have to see the senior Healers? You don't think they could try to make her keep him there, do you?"

"That, Doctor McCoy, I can assure you **she will not do**. If you recall she did ask for two security officers to go as well as a silent statement that he would return to the ship. We will have to wait to see if she will share with us her reasons for seeing the senior Healers when she returns." while Spock had a reasonable idea about what she would want to see them about it was just a hypothesis based on what she had said earlier, what he had observed, and his knowledge of the Vulcan way. While it seemed a reasonable idea it was not logical and Healer Rai was from Vulcan's most renowned family of leading healers and scientists so her actions would be logical. "If you two will excuse me I shall contact my parents about that visit and then will meditate for fifteen standard minutes."

After Spock had left McCoy glanced into the Intensive Care Unit at Hanley then at Kirk and smiled, "I do not know about you but I would really like to know what has gone on. That cunning little Vulcan knows something he is not telling us. The fact that it is something he has to meditate on means it is puzzling even him. Wonder what it is?"

"Do you think it is something we really need to know, Bones, or are you like me and have a feeling it is something we would really like to know about? I'm sure if he feels we should know about it he will tell us."

In his quarters Spock arranged with his father for the crew to be given shore leave time and his mother insisted on the bridge crew having a meal and spending enough time with them to have a proper visit. Fortunately his mother knew only too well he was teasing her when he asked her what she meant by a proper visit for surely a visit was a visit. With that over Spock sat quietly on the floor and stilled himself in the pose he learned so many years ago to calm the mind and allow him easy access to the answers he was after, the answers that were there to be found only quiet meditation. During his conversations with Healer Rai she had raised, in his depths, many questions he now sought answers for, and had silently as well as vocally asked him what he would have done in her position. Without saying it Healer Rai had asked if he fully understood his feelings towards Jim Kirk.

* * *

A/N The lull between the storms is akin to the breathing time between championship boxing bouts - but then it is winter fighting with autumn - just get almost dried out before the next downpour and thunder storm.

Thanks for reading and reviewing.

HAVE FUN.


	18. Chapter 18

The one thing Spock was sure of was that he had been truthful in that he did not want to nor care to dwell on his feelings towards Jim as they were so much a part of him. He also was sure that somehow, somewhere, during all the time they had known each other there had been that separation between when they were first together on the ship and were apart from each, because of the expected and accepted differences in their ranks in the service and their genetic makeup, and when they became a part of each other. He did not know when that had occurred nor how but to deny that it had happened was illogical. What right had he had to ever question Heal Rai about what she shared with Colin Hanley based just on a time factor when he could not saw the exact time that Jim Kirk had come to mean more to him than just his commanding officer? As he let himself just relax he did feel a part of himself, he knew it was his Human side, wish he could have been in with Healer Rai when Officer Hanley saw her again. She had not said how they parted but it was clear she had deep feelings for him and that he had thought of her over the years. It would have been fascinating to see how Officer Hanley reacted to seeing Healer Rai again. He had noticed a distinct, to a Vulcan, change in her expression and stance when she first saw Officer Hanley. It was one of those things Humans would not know to look for but it was there and a mixture of pleased surprise and concern. There had been the occasional slips in Healer Rai's composure when she looked at Officer Hanley that revealed, to him, more than she possibly was aware of.

If he cared to admit it Spock was sure that another Vulcan would have been able to detect similar changes in him when he would see Jim Kirk return to the ship after a hazardous off-ship event or be recovering in Sick Bay on that bed. He was sure that healer Rai would have been aware that he had noticed her visual indications as to her feelings and yet she had made no comment. It was true. She had seen in him what he had seen in her, a reflection of how they felt for their Human friend, although perhaps for both of them friend was not the correct word but he wondered what would best suit Healer Rai's relationship with Hanley. He knew without doubt that Jim Kirk was his t'hy'la. Thinking of Jim made him realize he had not told Jim that his father and mother would be expecting them for a meal along with Healer Rai and Officer Hanley and that his father would make arrangements for those crew members who wished to have shore leave to have access to accommodation as well as meals.

He walked to Kirk's quarters and was not surprised to find McCoy there nor the two empty glasses on Jim's desk. "Captain, Doctor, I have been in contact with my father and he would like you to know he will arrange for there to be accommodation and meals available for those from the crew who would like some shore leave on Vulcan and my mother has stated that she expects the bridge crew as well as Healer Rai and Officer Hanley to join them for a meal at their house."

"Wonder how the assessment is going?" McCoy looked at Spock, "Any ideas?"

"I have often found it a waste of energy and time to speculate on such matters, Doctor. I have no doubt that Healer Rai will tell us what we need to know of the assessment and she did say that she would give you all the information she gathers." Having known the doctor as long as he had Spock saw a flicker of disappointment about his eyes, "I will, however, say that I would expect her assessment of Officer Hanley to be as thorough as your own has been and will be when you, no doubt, give him an in depth assessment to verify her findings."

"You know, I'd give good money to see if Hanley will give her the trouble he gives me and what he does to try and get out of it or leave before it is over. I swear he has given you two lessons in how to be difficult when dealing with doctors and how to answer yet not answer a questions a doctor asks."

"I do not know about you two but I would imagine that Healer Rai could handle him. She may look delicate but I but it would take the full banks of photo torpedoes on the Enterprise to knock her off her mission of assessing Officer Hanley. There is just that look about her, I cannot say exactly how I would describe it, it just all but yells out not to push her when she has decided on an action." Kirk looked at Spock and slightly smiled, "Very much the Vulcan woman in charge."

"It is a look that, I can assure you, Captain, not just Vulcan women have. I have seen that look many times on my mother's face and in that similar stance as well. Unfortunately I made the mistake once to, as you say, push her when she had made a decision and all I will say is that I gained a very healthy respect for what a woman can do with just words and looks."

Without saying a word or outwardly reacting McCoy made a mental note to ask Spock's mother about her son's transgression that would have got him that look. Often he had thought that Spock would have been corrected strictly by Sarek. "If she does say that Officer Hanley can resume duties I will have him on limited duties for at least sixty standard days and then gradually back to full duties."

"I doubt if Officer Hanley would be able to do that, Doctor. Having worked with and studied the man I believe that he would disregard medical orders within three days if you limited him to that length of time. If I may I would suggest you tell him he will be assessed for full duties after seven standard days."

McCoy looked to Kirk for support, "Jim, tell our suddenly knowledgeable about hangovers colleague who has not once, to our knowledge, experienced one, just what one as bad as he has had can do to a Human male."

Kirk looked from Spock to McCoy and back to Spock for a moment, "Now although Spock might not have ever experienced one himself he has seen us, you and I, a good many times trying to function with one." he turned and looked at McCoy, "He has often made sure that things got done around the ship while you and I slept off hangovers by telling the crew we had other matters to take care of and discuss."

There was surprise on McCoy's face when he looked at Spock, "You cunning little Vulcan, all those times when I would go back on duty and nobody asked why I was late or, if they asked anything, they would ask if the Captain and I had sorted out whatever it was we had to sort out." He glanced at Kirk who nodded then back at Spock, "Well how's about I let him know he will be watched for those seven days and at the end of that time reassessed so that he is able to go to full duties?"

"I am certain he would be agreeable with that as it is a logical way of assessing his abilities at the role he is best suited for. No doubt you will have fellow officers reporting to you about how he is doing as well as just happening to pop in and check on him as you do to the bridge crew?"

Kirk's intercom unit beeps and he reaches out, "Kirk here."

"Transporter Room, Sir. Healer Rai and Officer Colin Hanley have returned and gone the Sickbay and Officers Wayne Glenn and Paul Quinn have returned as well and are in their quarters."

"Thank you for notifying me, Officer Douglas. Kirk out."

Spock raised and eyebrow and looked at Kirk, "Captain, how did you know that was Officer Douglas?"

"Of all the officers who operate the transporter when Scotty is off duty or on other matters Officer Douglas is the only one Scotty and I are in agreement about. He is a very fine officer who does not follow the procedure when announcing who has beamed aboard."

"His announcement seemed up to standard."

"It was more than up to standard, Spock, that is the difference. Most would just say that Healer Rai had returned with Officers Hanley, Glenn, and Quinn but he gave their given names. When Scotty asked why he did it he said it was to avoid any confusion should there be more than one officer with similar sounding surnames but different given names."

"As you might say, Spock, it is logical but not necessary."

Spock looked at Kirk then at McCoy as he raised an eyebrow, "I do, Doctor, see how it would be beneficial to know exactly who is being beamed aboard. At times I am sure it is of great assistance when there are similar sounding family names or family names that have some other use as in somebody being the real McCoy."

Again Kirk's intercom buzzed, "Kirk here."

""Lieutenant Uhurar here,Sir. Healer Rai has asked me to contact you and ask you , Doctor McCoy, and Mister Spock to meet her in Doctor McCoy's office as soon as you can."

"Thank you, Uhura. Kirk out." As he stood Kirk looked at his two friends. "Well, gentlemen, we should get some answers now."

As they started out of Kirk's quarters McCoy said, "Let's just hope they are what we want."


	19. Chapter 19

When they entered McCoy's office both Healer Rai and Officer Hanley were standing and looked at them as they walked in. "It is good to see you again, gentlemen. As you can see Officer Colin Hanley has fully recovered. By stating that I mean he has fully mentally recovered from the effects of toitak and has recovered sufficiently enough physically to pass the senior physical fitness level test of Star Fleet but will need a few days to get what some would have called "ship legs" before he is able to be tested for the senior physical fitness level in all conditions as is required by the field he prefers and is best suited for. I believe, Doctor McCoy, you will be able to arrange that when you deem it the appropriate time to do so."

McCoy nodded and went to his computer and quickly saw how in depth her report was and knew he would have to sit down and study it. "If you feel up to it, Officer Hanley, I will give you the tests as required by Star Fleet."

"I'm ready, Doctor." With a nod Spock knew was for Healer Rai, yet he knew his friend and Captain would still see it as just a nod of agreement to both of them, Officer Hanley followed McCoy into the other room.

"If I may," Healer Rai looked briefly at Kirk then at Spock, "I would like to have a few minutes alone with Mister Spock. We have matters to discuss."

"That's fine. While McCoy checks out Hanley, you talk with Spock, as I have to tell the crew of Spock''s father arranging for those who wish to have shore leave to be accommodated and fed and for both his parents to invite the bridge crew, along with you and Officer Hanley, to dinner with them."

Spock knew to Jim Kirk there was no real change in Healer Rai but Spock had seen the trace of a surprise on her face, just a momentary flicker of the muscles of her upper lip and slight tightening of the muscles beside her eyes. "I must thank the Ambassador and his wife for their kind offer when we arrive. Now, if you will excuse us, Captain."

In a briefing room close to Sickbay Healer Rai walked to the computer and put a disc in it then looked at Spock, "You must know this was done without Colin knowing that this part was being recorded. I believed, and still believe, you of all beings, have a right to know what transpired when he first woke in my rooms, of our first conversation. You will see my reasoning for believing you have the right to see this."

Kirk was pleased when he went to the Bridge that Scotty was there as he would be able to tell all four of them at once of the invitation to the dinner. "Uhura, put me on ship-wide."

"Ship-wide open, Sir."

"Attention crew, this is the Captain. We are to remain at Vulcan for just under forty-eight standard hours and during this time the Ambassador Sarek has arranged for there to be places available for those who wish to have short leave to stay and have meals. Officer Douglas will note your name when you are beamed down. Enjoy your stay. Kirk out."

"That was a grand thing for him ta do for the crew."

"That was for the main crew, Scotty." Kirk was aware of the way Scotty, Uhura, Sulu, and Chekov looked at him and thought they would be thinking that they had to stay aboard. "I want each of you to select an officer who will man your stations this evening planet-time while we go to dine with Spock's mother and father."

"All of us?"

"The invitation was for the entire main bridge crew to attend and, last time I looked, you four along with McCoy, Spock, and myself are considered the main bridge crew."

"I don't know about the rest of you but having a proper cooked meal is what I miss so much at times. Do you remember when we last had a meal with them? Spock's mother is a very good cook."

"And the way she had both Earth dishes as well as Vulcan ones for us to try."

"Aye, and the drinks to match them."

"Okay, we will wait for Spock to let us know when we are to go down and in the meantime think of those officers and notify them."

Spock was not sure exactly when he had expected to see but a part of him realized just how close to how it would seem to others had it been James Kirk and himself on the monitor and not Healer Rai and Officer Hanley. The two security guards who had gone with them had followed Healer Rai with Officer Hanley clearly slightly sedated on a stretcher. Once in her office the officers had placed him on a bed Healer Rai indicated and a young nurse had given him and injection and the three had left the room.

Officer Hanley had taken two point one nine minutes to be fully aware of where he was but Spock noticed how he only briefly, and then only partly, opened his eyes before shutting them and taking a deep breath.

"Officer Hanley, do you know where you are and why you are here?" Spock noticed how her voice was that which she used an a professional and not as a friend.

"In another medical office as I had the grandfather of all hangovers. Hearing is still not right."

"Perhaps it is not your hearing. Will, will you open your eyes and look at me?"

It was in her stance, more than her voice, that slight hesitation, the repeating of a word, that Vulcans seldom did unless their emotions were engaged.

Slowly Officer Hanley had opened his eyes and looked at her. For a fleeting moment there was a slight muscular pain in Spock's chest as the look Hanley gave Healer Rai was so like the look Jim had given him those times he had been seriously injured and just woken, that look of. Yes, he could admit it to himself here, that look of love.

"Rai?" Just as Jim had so often done to him Hanley reached out to her and, as he had done all those times, Healer Rai did the same, had gripped his hand and nodded.

"Yes. You remembered me all this time?" Her voice was back to familiar tones and softer as was her posture.

"You're not an easy lady to forget for so many reasons."

"In those few hours we had together I felt some things I had not felt before but had seen in others, thing that I have remembered. I felt how you felt about me, how you felt about me in a way my bondsmate never did. You helped me realize I was not just property like he had made me feel, that, apart from my career, I was of worth."

The recording ended then and Spock accepted it. Clearly Healer Rai had seen the same similarities he had seen with their two relationships and knew he would be interested in how Hanley reacted upon seeing her again. As he looked at her Spock saw how Healer Rai reached out and erased what he had just been shown.

"This is the disc for Doctor McCoy as it contains the results of my testing and my assessment as to Officer Hanley's fitness, both mentally and physically, so that he has a comparison should he wish to compare findings. With Officer Hanley's permission I did record some of the actual testing that are methods to test and assess Vulcans, it did not surprise me that he would only just pass our requirements and easily passes the benchmark for Star Fleet and the Federation."

"I thank you for allowing me to see that. I am certain that Doctor McCoy will find your findings and method of testing of great interest. Oddly I am not surprised that Officer Hanley would only just pass Vulcan requirements as he is Human and has been recovering for toitak poisoning."

For a moment Spock felt like a school boy being confronted by a stern teacher when Healer Rai looked at him, "Might I know why you suspected toitak?" she smiled, "If memory serves you were given advanced science lessons while still quite young and while botany is a main requirement that does not explain how you would know of it."

"The particular individual who had the book had a great dislike of Vulcans and would have known that toitak, in a moderate dose, can kill Vulcans. To get the book from him a person had to, the Human expression is to drink him under the table but is more correctly stated by saying that the person wishing to get the book from him had to be able to consume more of the drink he poured than the man himself did. The drink that the person wishing to acquire the book was poured from a different bottle than the one the man's own drinks were poured from. When Officer Hanley returned to the ship with the book he handed me the book and was violently ill. As he handed me the book I was aware of a peculiar faint order on his breath and I recalled the aroma from a science class about rare poisonous plants."

"He spoke coherently when he returned?"

"He only said 'I believe this may belong to you, Sir.' and held out the book, not releasing it to me until he was certain I had a firm hold on it. It was only as I took hold of the box that the book was in that he collapsed and was violently ill. I was aware of a strange aroma on his breath as he spoke but it was more pronounced once he had emptied his stomach on the Transporter pad."

"Good, that is what I suspected. Although I know others would want to know the details of how the book was found and returned I believe your father has dealt with that and I shall inform him before the meal that Officer Hanley does not want to be known as the one who retrieved it but that it was **your** investigative skills and knowledge and **Captain Kirk's** support that time was spent searching for it."

For a moment she stood silent and Spock sensed that she was thinking of another time and another place, "That is why his name is not mentioned about the event you spoke of before and by Captain Pike never mentioned who the person had been although I was aware that he knew who it was."

Healer Rai nodded, "It was agreed among those of us there that nobody would speak his name. We ensured whenever he left us that his face was hidden under a cap so nobody could identify him. The cap was the idea of Captain Christopher Pike."

"Healer Rai and Spock, please come to my office. I have asked Captain Kirk to join us."

As Spock looked at Healer Rai he saw how she had clearly prepared herself for whatever McCoy had to say and he was sure she would have several alternative plans made to cover almost every possibility. He had not thought of any way either McCoy nor Kirk would easily let Hanley leave the ship, not after Healer Rai's report. It was going to be, he was sure, fascinating to see how two very different physicians assessed Hanley's fitness and what their findings were.

"Well, about time you three showed up." McCoy stood as they entered and the first thing Spock was aware of was the Officer Hanley was not present. He could see from the way she was standing Healer Rai was not surprised but there was uncertainty on Jim's face.

"I don't know how but apart from needing a bit more sleep and about a week's sustained moderate exercise plan he should be back to the level of fitness required for me to assess him as fit enough to resume his former role on the ship." McCoy had looked at each of them and shaken his head. "He will join us to go the dinner with Spock's parents, I've sent him to rest till then. Said I would give him plenty of notice."

Kirk looked at the others and felt the relief he saw on their faces. He knew he would have to have a long talk with both Healer Rai and Spock. **No.** He stopped himself. Knew he would like to have that talk, yet he did not have to have it. There were some things that he did not really have to know and whatever had been said between Healer Rai and Spock was something he did not have to know. He realized he was looking forward to the meal with Spock's family as he was sure the dinner conversation would be interesting.


	20. Chapter 20

The nine of them beamed down to the courtyard of Spock's Parent's house and Sarek and Amanda were there to meet them: Sarek looking as relaxed as Kirk knew the man would allow himself to be and Amanda looking very pleased to see them.

"Thank you for inviting us to dine with you, Lady Amanda." Uhura smiled and held out a framed image she had of Sarek, Amanda, and Spock she had taken last time they had all been here and she saw them sharing an obviously happy moment together.

"Oh, that is beautiful. Thank you so much."

Chekov nodded to both Sarek and Amanda, "I can see how true that old Russian saying is and how right Mister Spock is to speak of this as a special place. The Russian saying is _'The further from the heart the closer to the heart.'_ It is so right for this place and you two."

"It is pleasing to know our son refers of this as a special place. You are all most welcome to be here any time you are on Vulcan." Sarek nodded

.

Sulu held out some flowers, "I have grown these in the lab for a special occasion and this is most decidedly one."

"Oh, it is so long since I have seen flowers from Earth. Thank you. Carnations, roses, lilacs, dahlias, lavender, daffodils, and just look at that sunflower, Sarek." Spock saw the surprise and joy on this mother's face and saw that special smile his father rarely displayed in public when he looked at his mother.

"It is magnificent, my wife."

Scotty held out to Amanda an old Gaelic to English dictionary, "I know ye are a teacher and ye may find this gives ye a wee bit of fun with the young ones if you were ta give them a wee item written in Gaelic to translate. I know at times Mister Spock nae understands me."

"From what we hear, Mister Scott, that is largely due to the emotionalism that you use when you are speaking with Gaelic words. I would imagine you were exposed to it as a child and found it useful to release emotional stress when talking to my son. I may just do as you suggest and test my students with some of the words and I know I will find it of great interest. Thank you."

McCoy looked from Sarek to Amanda then back at Sarek and held out a large bottle, "I recall you expressed, while a patient in my Sickbay, an great liking for this and know it is some-thing you had said was difficult to get on Vulcan."

"Ahh," Sarek nodded as he took the bottle from McCoy and looked right at him, "Most kind of you, Doctor McCoy. I did enjoy the taste, the intermingling of the four citrus fruits that were common on Earth with just a little of **your special brew**."

Kirk shook his head as he knew and knew the others knew what McCoy's special brew was and knowing that Vulcan metabolism did not deal well with too much of that brew. No doubt McCoy would have taken that into account.

Kirk then slowly held out a book to Sarek, "I saw this and thought you might like to see how in the late twentieth and early twenty-first century great mistakes or faux pas were made in the translation of diplomatic papers and the major faux passes made in the different diplomatic services on Earth and the early exploration into space."

"I am sure I will find it most enlightening, Captain."

They were all sitting down and enjoying a festive meal along with friendly conversation while relaxing the cocoon for friendship when a messenger came in and said there was a short and rather cryptic message from the Council of Elders for Healer Rai.

Spock was not sure if the others noticed how Healer Rai quickly glanced at Hanley before she said, "Will you kindly tell me the message?"

"It as that they are all in agreement with your request and know it is the right thing for you and for Vulcan."

"Thank you, for that." She looked around at those at the table and longest at Officer Hanley. "I was **not** about to **lose you again**. I was not going to lose you and what you not only mean to me but how I feel around and with you as well as, as illogical as it is, when I think of you, Colin Glenn Hanley. I proposed to the Elders that, if you are willing, I deeply desire to marry you. I will spend half my time here on Vulcan and half my time at Star Fleet Headquarters teaching as well as working."

She looked at Kirk, "Forgive me, Captain Kirk, but I did send a message to them to tell them what I proposed and they said it was within the regulations as Officer Hanley would remain on active service."

There was a stillness about the table as what had just happened seemed to hang in the silence. As he looked at his Captain and friend Spock could see confusion plainly on his face, "Captain, Healer Rai and Officer Hanley have a history, a friendship, that is none of our business apart from acknowledging it exists and has for many years."

Slowly Hanley stood and walked over to where Healer Rai stood and gave her a tight hug and kiss before he held up right hand with his index and middle finger straight and together and rubbed her two similar fingers, "I never thought I would ask this and I apologize that I cannot pronounce your full Vulcan name but, Rai, I would be honored if you would be my wife."

Sarek called for the messenger, "Contact T'Pau and tell her there is to be a small ceremony here tonight and to please come."

At the mention of T'Pau the others looked around and Sarek said, "She will officiate on behalf of Vulcan."

"And, if I may, I will officiate not only for the Enterprise but also on behalf of Star Fleet."

"Now wait just a moment, **all of you!** " McCoy looked around the room and there was a sudden stillness. "Nobody sees anything wrong with this? Nobody sees any difficulty with this?"

"Should we, Doctor? My parents are proof that such a marriage can last because despite their many and varied differences they do, in fact, have a deep bond. It is obvious that Healer Rai and Officer Hanley have a deep bond that has stood the tests of time." Spock looked at McCoy for a moment before he saw a twinkle in his eyes and realized he had reacted just the way McCoy knew he would react.

"My point exactly, Spock. The only two beings this really matters to are Healer Rai and Officer Hanley. I just wanted to make sure you all felt like I do. We here are the witnesses and this is the wedding dinner." He raised his glass and looked at Healer Rai and Officer Hanley. "All the best of the best to you two. Although I have only known Healer Rai for a short time I am sure she and Officer Hanley will have a great adventure together for the rest of their lives together. I salute you two."

The others all stood then and raised their glasses, "To the couple."

When T'Pau arrived she looked at those present before looking at Sarek, "Why have I been summoned?"

"Forgive the urgency, T'Pau, but this is a matter of vital importance and this is the man to whom Vulcan owes so much but whose identity must not be known to those not present."

T'Pau looked at Officer Hanley, "Thee are the true officer who retrieved to book?"

"Yes. **Mister Spock found it** but I retrieved it. Any credit goes to Captain Kirk and Mister Spock, I do not wish to be known for it."

All there saw the way she looked at him, "As ye wish, your name will not be mentioned. I believe ye have helped Vulcan before but I accept your silence." She looked around at the others then at Healer Rai, "For Sarek to summon me it must be to officiate at a ceremony and that is your marriage to Officer Hanley, is it not?"

"Yes, T'Pau, it is my marriage to him. As you know my bondsmate committed suicide after killing our child. I know that there is the basis of a bond with Officer Hanley that is very different to what I had with my bondsmate as this bond was by my own choice and selection and not one made for me."

T'Pau nodded and then looked at Kirk, "Captain Kirk, am I to believe that you will perform a ceremony as directed by Star Fleet to make this union a recognized one?"

"Yes, that is correct."

"Then perhaps it is best if I perform the Vulcan ceremony that I am most familiar with for such a marriage. You will have to understand it will all be in Vulcan."

"It will be an honor to be present. The fact that it is done in Vulcan only adds to the importance and significance of the ceremony."

For eighty-seven point four one standard minutes the officers from the Enterprise were transfixed as first T'Pau performed her part of the ceremony, performing what Spock and his family recognized as an affirmation and strengthening of an existing bond, and Kirk did his.

Amanda had seen how T'Pau had looked at the flowers and, as she was about to leave, took her over to the vase, "I would be honored if you would care to take some with you. I am certain Officer Sulu would not mind as he grew them on the ship."

"Indeed." T'Pau said as she examined the flowers and picked out three. "Most kind of you."

"Thank you for your great hospitality, Sarek and Amanda. We will go back to the ship and Spock can stay and have some time with you. We have twenty-three more hours on here. It has been a most unusual evening."

"Thank you all for coming. I only wish you could come more often."

"I agree with my wife, Captain Kirk, on both accounts. Thank you all for coming. It has been an honor."

"I will return to the ship shortly, Captain."

On the ship as they are leaving the Transporter room Kirk looked at Healer Rai and Officer Hanley, "It is good that you two have found each other."

Healer Rai looked from Officer Hanley to Kirk, "Captain, we will be with one another for the next twenty-three hours and then I shall stay on Vulcan to finalize a logical system where I will spend time at Star Fleet and time on Vulcan."

"I have heard that many who try to make such a marriage,"

"Captain, we have known one another for years, years when there was silence yet a sense of the other. We met up again perhaps by chance or what some Humans call Divine Intervention. There is a saying at the bonding where you both acknowledge that you may be parted but you are never really parted. We were apart from each other all those years but were, and now always will be, a part of each other."

"If you will excuse me, Captain, I would like to take my wife to my quarters as we have much to discuss before we ship out tomorrow and she writes up a report on toitak for both Vulcan and Star Fleet."

As they started to walk away Healer Rai turned and looked at Kirk and he felt that she was looking deep into him, "I would like to think that you and Mister Spock find the same as we have found, Captain Kirk, for you and Spock **are** a **part of each other** even when you are apart."

After they had gone and he stood alone in the Transporter Room Kirk found he understood what Healer Rai had said and wondered if Spock was, as he was, aware of how true it was, of how, whether they were parted by a chess board or galaxies, they had become a part of one another. He knew that he was thankful every day that Spock was a part of his life.

 **FIN**

* * *

 **A/N Uppppps, sorrry - thought I had posted this mid-week and complete, Had a few problems with the southerly storm we are still enjoying - just something so special about walking a dog in hurrying hard horizontal hail. Well, that is that one done. Thanks for reading and reviewing.**


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